ellehcim

moved

2006-08-17T23:19:00.000+08:00

moved to http://michymich.livejournal.com/.
feels weird tho.. like a have an ai mei relationship with this page.

i also duno why im moving.. just following my gut feeling.

should i move?

2006-08-16T19:15:00.000+08:00

im thinking of moving into my shop, since im not doing any good with that shop; might as well turn it into a shophouse.
i think i prefer LJ to blogger, but the thing is i have to leave behind all the past memories...

tra lala..

lazy week

2006-08-15T22:36:00.000+08:00

i just watched Life Story on Abigail Chay. very touching :(
i hope society can learn to accept these people who are no less normal than us; they are just slightly different.

*
went to fisherman with mich tay yest. i haven been there for some time and i think its a nice place to chill out with friends.. let the waves drown out the noise of sorrows.

met up with jiajia just now for gelare waffles and ice cream & i finally returned her her VCD & gave her the eyeliner i promised her some time ago.

sigh.
im searching...

im fugly

2006-08-14T01:41:00.000+08:00

michYmich says:
u a;ways say ppl pretty one

michYmich says:
everyone is pretty

michYmich says:
so kind man u

Let's Wait A While (stupid irene) says:
LOL
except FOR YOU

Let's Wait A While says:
fugly

*goes to one corner and draws circles*

ant bully

2006-08-14T00:05:00.000+08:00

today passed me by so fast.

i woke up at almost 3pm today! all becoz i slept at 7am. AM AM AM!!! bad on me.
after meeting bao, ray, stir & yin in town for dinner (i waited like 30-45mins for the 'famous' hokkien mee at the Food Republic in wisma & it din turn out that fab after all; but i dont think it was a waste of time... no try no know!), i left for PS to find darl.
saw aiwei with her boyfriend :)

i landed up in youwei's house to play mahjong with them 3.. till 6 plus! we went home to snooze till noon, then i met darl to watch a movie.
we scissors, paper, stone ed.
ant bully (represented by me) OR my super ex girlfriend (represented by him)

ant bully won.

some ppl may not like these cartoony shows, but i love them. im not embarrassed in the least to say that i enjoy spongebob squarepants, love tom & jerry, & i always get my weekly dose of animes.

its a very cute show with 'a moral behind the story'. reminded me of the time when i was a kid & i loved ants (not the red ones that bite!). i hurt one accidentally one day in my gran's house (dont ask me what i was doing, i duno myself.). dismayed, i watched it crawl with feeble steps.
then, his/her ant friend came along & carried it! i think it was helping it get back to the colony.. and i was touched.

ahem.. getting all emo here.

the last cartoon movie i watched was Over the Hedge, i think.. and i loved it.
wish i lived in a cartoon world where people dont die even if they get run over by trucks, where animals/bugs really talk like the way we do, where the imagination can be boundlessly wild, and where the ending is always happy.

yay.
and everybody will be happy.

i walk blindly all the way

2006-08-10T23:28:00.000+08:00

all along, i have been walking blindly.
i attended nursery, kindergarden, then primary school, all thanks to my family members who planned it for me.

when i slowly and sadly grew up, i got to choose my secondary school. i got into pingyi secondary. i always think that its ok to be in a neighbourhood school. so what if im not from a "ming xiao"? it doesnt matter to me. my school is near, and i met many good people there. i spent 4 happy years in that school.
i ~~was good in~~ loved writing composition and my favourite teacher mrs dana encouraged me to go into mass com nx time.

i went to nyp for 2mths, quitted coz i was stupid. i went to Tp instead, the place i truly belong in... tho i showed no particular flair nor talent in design. but i enjoyed it, and i learnt.
design touches me.
but i guess i din touch it back.

wildly, i stumbled on. walking my path of any-o-how road with no planning, no nothing.
all the part time jobs ive gotten during schooling days "came" to me. i did not need to go search for it.
even at amore, they asked if im interested to work only when i was signing up as a member.
i joined dbs and regretted.
i said i wanted to be a flight attendant and i went to work in a bank.

i really need to sit down alone and think hard.. even tho i have been thinking.. to no avail.
something is wrong with me..!!!

im blind =(

but even so.. here's an old video taken last year; celebration of lester & my bday.. fond memories :P

i miss Japan

2006-08-10T20:04:00.000+08:00

was browsing through my photos in my computer (im going to print certain pictures soon!) and i felt a pang of longing to travel again. my aunt is planning a family trip to New Zealand, a place i have been wanting to visit, but im not going to pin my hopes very high to prevent major disappointment.
anyhow, i still have my Europe trip in sight within the next few years.

Happy 41st bday to good old Singapore

2006-08-09T23:04:00.000+08:00

i met my aunt leng to eat in town.
we had a bowl of *free laksa, a *$1 bento lunch at sakae, & we went to check out the (copy-mache's) Village at heeren. its deserted.

*perks of owning a HSBC credit card

met up with rayner & baoqi to eat in bugis, & watch fireworks later on.

a pity i was too full to indulge. but they taste fab; rayner said that it wub be better with more meat, but i tink too much meat is a turn off.. the skin is very crispy! nice!!! plus the nice mayo :D~~

one thing though, i prefer my companions who eat with me to observe some table manners.
example, not munching out loud with the mouth open, not appearing to be too greedy and snatching away all the food, and....

well, well.

we walked to esplanade after that to view the 9pm fireworks, but before we knew where we were going, the colorful explosion led us (and half of the singaporeans) there.

not very well taken; i could have done better with a tripod & a ~~SLK~~ SLR.
even then, i wudnt be able to capture the beauty of it that has to be admired with the naked eye.
click here to see the videos.

it was crowded like mad. we tried to escape, but the crazy crowd proved too much. we landed up in the stomach of the esplanade, hoping to find fresh air & a way out but we were trapped! zombies all around us.
we found a secret stairway & descended quickly & i suggested going for the chocolate fondue.
by that time, sweat was pouring from our armpits and being greedy and sweaty and tired, we went in to take a rest.

delectable! with white choc, milk choc, and my fav dark choc to dip in!

unglam.
i swear, her hand looks like claws.

but you know what?

unglam or not, sweaty or not, i do love Singapore.
despite everything negative, she is my home.

love love!

me... a misanthropist?

2006-08-07T18:52:00.000+08:00

i duno what is wrong with the world.

why do we exist to pretend?
why must i smile and say hi, and tolerate people who ask me "how are you?" as if they really care, and bear & grin to repeated meaningless questions, and repeated meaningless comments?

why must i entertain people who come to me only when they need help, an answer i may have to their relentless question, or when they need a listening ear that they take for granted?

why must i put up with your excessive drinking habit?

these are just the flies outside the pandora box. the real problems lie within.

the human heart is dark.
are we doomed?

happy bday pictures... and more.

2006-08-06T23:46:00.000+08:00

one thing about keeping an online diary: miss one week worth of things to blog about & it snowballs.
i'll try to remember & regurgitate as best as i can.

first and foremost: my precious's birthday pictures.
we did not really celebrate it as i would have liked due to the recent death of my grandpa, but i cannot brush it off either, for it is for somebody special.

so we subsituted everything on the eve of his birthday.

mudpie (at Gelare) instead of a cake

hazelnut icecream & french vanila on good old waffles

mr lys bought a packet of wasabi chips to try... its not bad if you like wasabi coz the flavour is quite strong. i dipped them in ice cream to take away the spice.

we had a nice walk at east coast beach after that and then went home at 12 midnight to open my present to him.

next morning, we went to wakeboard. its something ive been wanting to try since ages, but im so lazy that... never mind.

its really tiring.. the guy recommended for us to try kneeboarding first to get used to the tension and all and so we did.
my first thought when i hit the water was "it doesnt look so fast from up there!"
i lost control halfway & the board slipped out under my legs & i still held on tight!! i was still "surfing" without my board and it just din register for me to let go of the urm.. whatever you call it sticks-like-handle.
>_<""
and when i did let go, i swallowed a big mouthful of water & gagged.
but babes told me that a girl did that too.. and had her shorts ripped off by the current when she held on to the handle long after her board slipped away. i didnt notice coz i was fiddling with the camera but we realized that i caught that girl on video.. tho it din show the shorts being ripped out coz i stopped the film after the board got lost.

im ashamed to say that im so weak. only a couple of rounds and my legs are trembling; i still have to swim back and walk back from wherever i stopped to the starting point.
i gotta swim more alredy.. burn off all the mee pok caleries & up my stamina.

mr lys is much better than me. at least he can hold on till he's back to the starting point.
its not as easy as it looked; you have to control the direction by pulling left to ur stomach when you wanna make a right turn, and vice versa.
but its fun!

he decided to try the wakeboarding after kneeboarding for some time.. way to go!

opps.. down he goes!

but he tried again... and din succeed. but never mind, we shall attempt it again, alrites?
i think its so blardy difficult.. all the people were falling into the water like tadpoles straight from the starting point.

here is the video of mr lys's virgin attempt at wakeboarding.. but i think he just invented a brand new sport i call buttboarding.
pardon the shaky hands; no more energy left! i stopped kneeboarding after a few more rounds as i could feel my muscles at the limit (very limited limit) and i knew i was in for a couple of muscle-aching days.

we headed home to shower & went to catch the show "Click". i absolutely loved it! it is so hilarious, yet touching (tears welled up) at certain stages. a very meaningful show.. i give it 4.7/5

we went to the Loof after that, but it was so packed with people. the only place to sit was some obscure corner and i certainly dont think my baby deserved that on his bday. we just checked the place out anyway.

mr lys: we dont need to dine in a classy place.. anywhere is fine.
me: i know..

we ended up in Chijmes. its sucha nice place.. i think its a good place for the working class peeps to hang out.
there were so many places to choose from to eat at, and we walked and checked each one out & for no reason, landed up at Bobby's.

we ordered ribs & onion loaf as recommended by (i think the) manager.
the onion loaf portion is huge! its ok to share it with 3-4 people, but the both of us felt sick from eating so much onions.
the ribs were really good tho, the bday boy loved it.

we had a full pint of kilkenny each.

at the beginning...

after half a pint...

*hic!* woh teh hell aer.. *hic!*.. you? *hic*

heh.. just kidding.
hello, mr lys!

under the "bright starry" sky.

happy belated birthday :)
i hope all ur wishes that were wished upon a matchstick come true...

*
of coz, i had to endure muscle aches all over. but its interesting where i ached. i learnt which are the muscles i used, for the usual places where my muscles usually ache differ.

anyway, i met mich tay on thurday for some baking session. i met her at bedok interchange to buy lunch, and then headed to the supermarket to buy our ingredients.

the cake turned out fine, tho there were a couple (ok, more than a couple) of hiccups. the top was slightly chaotar and i moved it to the lower compartment.
then after i thought it was done, i realized the bottom half was not as done as the top, so we removed the top half which was nicely baked and returned the bottom for more heat.
needless to say, by the time everything was ready, the cake was in a crumbly mess.
but it tasted good nonetheless. my grandma said so!
*pat on the back*

we boiled potato & made potatos-in-their-jackets too. could have been better had the potatos been softer. i will improve in my next attempt & offer them to some brave guinea pig friends.
if they dont eat it, they cant really call themselves my friends.

*
met mich tay again. we went to town and i bought a very chic white dress from phuture london. i know i shdnt be spending since im not working now, but i know it in my guts that i just have to buy it because.
just because.

i had a good time with her shopping and eating and drinking and walking all the way to a coffee shop near bugis [from town] to find a telly to watch the final episode of the 9pm show.
then i had to da pian and we walked again to find a loo.
there is never a toliet when you need one urgently... and even after you've found one, there will be no toliet paper.
but luckily for me, we found the most beautiful loo in the world with lovely toliet paper.

when you're hungry, any food will taste heavenly.
when you need to shit, any toliet with toliet paper is like heaven.

i walked mich to marina square where she wud be meeting her friends and then i saw her waving to her friend who seems so familiar... and then i saw edna.
turned out my friend knows my friend's friend.

*
glad i have my trusty camera back; i lent it to my cousin for a week. that explains the overdue pictures; i had to use my aunt's cam and the size of her memo card differs from mine so i cant upload the pictures till mr lys burnt them for me using his.

sorry ster, for not meeting up. but im glad to know that you're coping well in the army. will meet up again nx time, yes?

*
went to catch the Fast and the furious - tokyo drift yest with ys. i bumped into maybelline and the bf in the arcade while i was making my way to the Time Crisis. hehe.. its nice to bump into old friends :)
they were going to catch Click! made me wanna watch it again.

anyway, i din find the fast and furious very good. it was just ok-ay. it was like a mix of initial D + fast and furious, so it din really work very well for me.
but the lead actor reminded me very strongly of edison chan.
ok, out of point.

i tink im getting boring-er.
more nx time then.

oh, some final words from mr lys that i just remembered.

i was thinking abt IQ issues & he asked me why i was stoning and i told him.

ys: i think your IQ is quite high..
me: why?
ys: coz you know how to choose boyfriend..
me: WAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA!

happy 21st to my darling boy

2006-08-03T19:04:00.000+08:00

HAPPY 21ST BIRTHDAY, DARLING!
Z
(as of 2.08.06)

I love you, always forever
Near and far, closer together
Everywhere, I will be with you
Everyday, I will devour you

Say you'll love, love me forever
Never stop, not for whatever
Near and far and always
and everywhere and everything

i love you baby.

a new beginning?

2006-07-31T20:31:00.000+08:00

im back from the funeral.
we went to cremate my grandfather today.. and the angels were weeping today, the weather gloomy & dark.

even tho i feel sad about his parting, i also feel a sense of relief for he has gone to a much better place.
the mandai cremation place is not foreign to me; having gone there last september for my maternal grandfather's cremation. at least the design of the place puts me at ease; its feels like im going to heaven when i take the escalator up to the cremation hall.

i din shed a single tear during the wake and the funeral.
maybe its because of my character.
maybe because they did not play the awful loud music like the one they did during my maternal grandfather's wake; the music somehow really makes us cry more.
maybe because there werent so many relatives sobbing out loud to pull at my heartstrings.
maybe because i know my grandpa is in a better place.
or maybe its because i have no tears left.

but my uncle & aunt cried so hard, it broke my heart.

im so thankful to the church members. during the 1st few days of the wake, not many people came. woodlands is so far away.. ive never appreciated just how far away it is till i have to go back and forth everyday.
i felt sad for my grandfather that not many friends came for him at his wake. but his church friends came by the dozens on sunday night, and they came along for the funeral today too. i felt so touched that they came for him.

im also thankful to family and friends who are concerned abt me. when one is at her lowest, it helps to have people offering support and encouragements.

another end of life.
what cheers me up is the kind church member who held my hand and told me that my grandfather was a "great man" who was always smiling away, always inviting others for "kopi".

everyday, some grieving family members stand at the glass window to watch the coffin move towards the furnace that will reduce their loved ones to ash.
yet everyday, mothers give births to babies.

such is the cycle of life..
im so tired. when is my due date?

yet another death

2006-07-29T16:31:00.000+08:00

the only consolation for me is the peaceful look on my grandpa's face in the coffin..
he accepted Christ awhile ago, and the simple furnishing of white & light purple made the entire scene look serene, with crosses guarding the body.

ive always been one who stays up late. but on friday morning, i really could not get to sleep, despite the hour well past my bedtime. as i always do at night before i sleep, i said a lil prayer for my aging grandparents..
even tho i do not attend church, i still believe in God.
my dad sms-ed me to call him; its urgent. and i did..
and he told me that my grandpa has passed away.
apparently he fell over something in the living room & my auntie called my dad (my uncle was in china). but when my dad got there, my grandpa was alredy gone. his body was stiff and cold :(

i broke down when i got the news and couldnt get to sleep.. exhausted, i slept after 7 plus am.

when i reached woodlands where my grandpa lived with my uncle and wife, an elderly woman asked me, "you seldom visit you grandfather, right? and he seldom visit you too..".
i felt shame and resentment towards myself.
monthly visits in the past with my sis and dad turned out to be once-in-awhile.
he had to come over to bedok to collect his own miserable pocket money. i told myself to earn enough and give him a better life but im too slow and now the chance is taken away from me forever.
in the 1st place, i dun even know how to go to my uncle's place, for that area is foreign to me, and my dad always drives us there.
im pretty useless.

my grandpa has always doted on me; i remember the days when he lived with me, he would buy bee hoon with peanuts and he would always pick the nuts for me. he would always buy ice creams and drinks for me. he conversed in hainanese with me cos his mandarin isnt good & he speaks no english, but i loved it. it gives me a reason to learn more hainanese.
even tho he din get along well with my maternal grandparents, i loved both very much..
but i guess i din do enough..

to think that just a few days ago, i was thinking that im quite blessed. i have everything; a good family, a good boyfriend, a few good friends, a good home, enough food.
i only need to work on my career...
but everything is different now.

in less than a year, my maternal grandpa passed away, then uncle gilbert, and now my paternal grandpa.
i used to believe that life is beautfiful and meaningful.. we just have to find our own meanings.
i duno. issit bullshit?

im disappointed and confused.
my "unwavering" pillar of support turned out to be infested with termits after all.
i can only depend on myself in the race against time.. to do what i want to do before everyone dear is taken away from me forever.

i love you.

the inaugural singapore young photographer award

2006-07-27T23:48:00.000+08:00

we were late.

the function that supposedly needed an invite to get in (rayner got an invite for me from his company pico, tks!) was urm.. alright at its best.
tho the photos (taken by people aged 15-25) were quite impressive, i felt that everything was spoilt by the lack of good organization & of coz, politeness.
one of my favourite photos is the one with the grape-in-the-glass-with-water-effect. totally cool!

we missed the award giving ceremony. couldnt see a damn thing with people standing around anyway; i felt like a midget there.
jinny, rayner and i made the best of it by helping ourselves to the fruit punch & foods that were provided (the dirty plates were unceremoniously piled all over the place). we headed to the exhibition of those pictures worthy of awards later but the crowd spoilt everything. no spatial control at all. (ha.. blame everything on someone else)

worst, the group that ushered the guest of honour dr vivian balakrishnan were so rude. they were like falling over each other trying to "make way for the mighty king". i have nothing against the minister, as it wasnt his fault that the guard dogs were so rude, demanding us to make a detour "because they are making their way over here". they even rudely tapped jinny's elbow to shoo her away, and they kept coming our way so we had to move away for them!
i guess they din realize that I was there too.. ahem.

hmph.. i think we have our rights to be anywhere we want, even tho there is a big shot there. im sure they can be less demanding and more polite, no?

anyway, there was this miss martini (thats her name!) lady who was friendly and spoke to us abt her work.
i like her kitten photo, the "dirty-feel" photo, & the lush green grass one too.
gawd.. think i wont remember what they are in a few months' time.

im quite impressed with many of the works there. tho i like & appreciate photography, i cant say im an avid photographer. i think im going to save up for a good digital SLR when i start working.
maybe i can even take part in the compeitition :P

pictures will be up once rayner sends me the photos.. haha! some are rather good!

cutie Iffah

2006-07-26T23:38:00.000+08:00

congrats to rizila & wati!

ys and i bumped into cutie Iffah & Rizi at parkway when we went there to buy sth. rizi told us that wati (who was at the building as well) is expecting their 2nd child!
what joy!
Iffah has grown from a chubby cutie to a pretty cutie!

she is such a sweetie... even tho she is naughty like any other child, but thats part and parcel of growing up, i guess :)
and she is really so sweet and lovely!
i feel so happy for my friends and their growing family (wati wants twins!)

*
saw this sign at parkway and it reminded me of the sign in KL that says "borrow $1000, get $1000".

hehe.. what the hell. i almost choked when i saw this.

i feel very at peace now.. for some unknown reasons =)

jinny's bday-outing pictures

2006-07-26T02:14:00.000+08:00

*kisses* for the bday girl

kisses beget kisses... albeit relunctantly.

rayner and i
its such a nice place to chill out, either with friends or alone. watching the dancing water in front of me, with foods all ard me.. whao.. good!!

johnny depp & i
alot of girls love him, but they dont understand that they dont stand a chance.. buahahahhawhahha!!

and neither do i :(

the busy bee bday missy went on to meet her other friends for dinner while rayner, jy & i went on to "walk walk"
and walked we did into a new restuarant. heheh.. we love food! New York New York: it looks like a nice place to try the foods & jy said one of their section looked like MY design during major project. i think mine's nicer :P
im glad you noticed, but note that its not exactly the same. buahhahaha! my one minute of glory.

looks interesting...

what's jy looking at?

waiting for food..

we ordered this .. tender chicken meat.. & a big glass of float to share.

free cotton candy!
green is in!

ARHM!

the rest doubles up as moustache :)

i was naive

2006-07-25T18:38:00.000+08:00

i used to think that to truly get to know a person well, i have to at least know him/her for abt 2 years, waiting for all the personality juices to spill out for me to see.

i was wrong.

some of my "friends" keep proving to me that i shouldnt give a fuck care how long i know them, because sometimes the oldest friendships are like milk: they turn sour & i should just dump them in the bin.
its disappointing.
should have checked the expiry date.
but there are blessings too; i remove them from my fridge and make space for the not-so-old but jiang yi qi (loyal) friends to come in.

really.. i take my word back abt my crap theory. some friends (new or old) surprise me by turning out to be the bestest pals while i was busy tending to the smelly milk.
fuck the smelly milk!

out they go! >:(

its a small world after all..

2006-07-24T23:02:00.000+08:00

itsssss a small world after all..
itsssss a small world after all..
itsssss a small world after all..
its a small small world~
there is just one moon and one golden sun
and a smile means friendship for everyone..
da da da.. da da da..

i went for class today!! wheeeee... cardio latino. mich tay thought i woudnt be able to make it for the class (not a groundless thought, tho) but hey hey! i did :)
somemore i reached early at 3pm when the class starts at 330pm. silly me.
really a fun, dancy class with the sexy moves. i like!!! im going to take up salsa and mich tay wants to too!! we'll go together after i get a job :D
after class, i waited for mich to knock off and i had cravings for yoshinoya (disappointing tho.. the rice was different frm the bugis outlet) & we went to tampines to eat & we sat there for hours chatting. i love that gurl.. she's a wunnerful fwen to be with.
*love*

her dad called to offer to pick her up for home, and she kindly offered me a ride home. on our way to wait for her dad, she saw a friend... & they chatted.

friend: yadda yadda yadda
mich tay: uh lala lo ba ba

continues for some time...

friend: ur friend looks familiar, i thought she was from my secondary school..
me: hmm? what school were you from?
friend: pingyi secondary..
me: ahhhhhhhh!?
friend: u were from pingyi!?
me: ya!! wads ya name?

continues for some time..

turns out ~~Hannah~~ Hannan?/Hahnan?/Hanan? is a year my junior (but from my class 402!), from NCC, attended rizila's wedding and i was there too, knows mr lys, herman, hamzi, etc.
hahah.. so coincidental. mich got to know him when they worked at the Escape Theme Park.
he actually recognized me and knows that i was frm the Band, and etc.. but i do not have the slightest idea who he is.

mich's parents and sister came to pick her up with her dog Ruffle aka gogo. a giant 2 yr old maltese with super thick fur... hahaha.. so cuteeeeee & so different frm maybelline's tiny kiki & lele! a happy family :)

its a small world after all...

my 1st white hair

2006-07-24T01:01:00.000+08:00

im still reeling from the shock.
3 nights ago, i looked in the mirror, ruffled my hair, and then i spotted it: a pure pure strand of white hair against my black crop.

i know, its not such a big deal, nor am i reluctant to age, but actually finding a white hair on my head freaks me out.it just does.
*shudders*
i know many people my age (i dont have to look far) are plagued by this white disease ages ago, but it happening to me is very much... different.
against mr lys's advice (you pluck one, three grow out), i exterminated that offending strand of hair.

sigh... its scary.

*
went out to 'celebrate' jinny's 20th bday today with rayner & jiayin. it wasnt a proper celebration tho, no cake and nth, tho we gave her our presents (hope you like it).

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!
may ur days be filled with joy, and do make full use of the present i gave you: hit on me!

pictures will be up when rayner sends them to me.

*
lemmi say that i have nothing against skinny & pretty pixies (ive plenty of petite acquaintances and many are nice enough). people who know me well enough (which equals to almost nobody) should know that, despite being fat & sometimes ugly myself; but i like myself enough, really.
but some small sized girls are really getting on my nerves. just becoz they are petite (a.k.a cute to men), the whole world 'stand on their side' against mere mortals like me.

some take their size as an advantage (the whole is going astern) and its disgusting.
grrr... i cant stand them cute acters.
and no, nothing happened to spark this off; im just... saying. cannot meh?

*
i felt friendless that night, when all i wanted to do was to talk to a friend who would listen to me despite the distance between us.
a list of numbers to dial, and no one to talk to...
=(

funny joke

2006-07-21T17:49:00.000+08:00

.: Im Loving it: In my littlepiece of hell:. says:
will make up my mind by this weekend

michYmich says:
u always like ah sum 1

michYmich says:
duno how to make up the mind

.: Im Loving it: In my little piece of hell:. says:
i am ah sum wat

michYmich says:
hwhwhhaha

michYmich says:
ok lor

michYmich says:
ah sum oi

.: Im Loving it: In my little piece of hell:. says:
yes auntie.

michYmich says:
eeh hello

michYmich says:
im not the same as u

michYmich says:
im at my peak now

michYmich says:
21 yrs of youth

.: Im Loving it: In my little piece of hell:. says:
haha... i at my pEAK gu some more.

michYmich says:
er.. u tink funny?
(but i was really laughing)

.: Im Loving it: In my little piece of hell:. says:
once again i said... GIVE MI SOME CREDIT>.... u think joke so easy to come up with ah

michYmich says:
HWAHAHAHAHHAWHAHHWAHAHAH

*
when will she ever learn?

the old days are no more

2006-07-21T02:20:00.000+08:00

bye ster.. may u enjoy ur new phase of life in NS.

and bye.... to the past.

bye.

tears fall
dreams gone
evaporated, vanished
as the enemy prowl on

tick tock
tick tock
gone

oh happy day~ oh happy day...

2006-07-19T01:12:00.000+08:00

im sooooooo happy today.
the heart is light and carefree (well.. minus the jobless part) & im singing a happy tune.

despite being happy abt meeting up with my aunt & cousin for lunch at grand hayatt hotel (pete's place), im a lazy bone through and through & i really had to drag my body away from the bed to bathe & all :P

it was a great lunch buffet. this buffet is not as heavy as the normal ones & we had really delicious bread (im a bread person), salad of my choice (i choose and mix the ingredients myself), pasta and dessert.
(and my cousin gave me a white bag for as my bday present! tkss!!)

after that, we took a cab to singapore swimming club with the intent to bowl, but the place was occupied by the championships thingy & so we went to book a room to play mahjong (and i saw an edison chan look-alike)
damn funny, the 3 of us trying to figure how to play 3 ppl mahjong :)
after mahjonging, we decided to go to the ktv to kill time; we sang for an hour (my cousin sings pretty good! he was the head boy for his choir back in his JC)
finally, someone who can sing shan hu hai with me.. tho i sing quite badly, but hey, its all abt having fun!

had dinner after that; not very satisfying in term of the quality (the jap food really cud be much better), but im happy all the same.

mr lys kindly came to fetch me (i din even noe that he was booking out today), and he even helped sent my cousin to katong & my aunt leng back to her newton place...
im glad that my aunt doesnt have to spend $ on cabs again (tho she can afford it, but she spent alot on us!) but im sorry to trouble mr lys :(
petrol is expensive! and all that pollution too.. lets stick to cycling!
*muackies*

we hung out at his hse after that and watched telly together and i fell aslp for awhile (i slept late last night and woke up early!)
he had to fetch his family frm the airport soon after and then return to camp & i went home and met my brother bear frain as we agreed.
i owed him his vcds for abt a million yrs :P
had a good time eating with him at HK cafe (his treat!!) and then we chatted and took the 'last' bus back home and he walked me to my block & gave me a book that ive always wanted to read ever since he recommended it to me as my bday present: kafka on the shore by haruki murakami (tks tks alot!)
whoever said that chivalry was dead?

my family, boyfriend & friend all in a day :)

*
ive been staying up to catch The Jeff Corwin Experience at 1am. i love that man; he's so talented, and he has this amazing thing with animals & he's so passionate abt what he does and i absolutely LOVE watching that man with the winning personality on telly.
my hero!

disappointments

2006-07-17T23:19:00.000+08:00

saded.
i lost my navel ring (pink) "head" in sentosa, i tink.
i was playing beach soccer with them boys and maybe i got a lil too excited, a lil too rough & somehow my precious ring is now buried in the sand.

OR maybe it came out when i was bathing.. as the female toilet was packed like crazy, i went to the public shower to wash myself. i din notice the head was missing till i put my hand to my belly (out of habit) during dinner & felt the round head missing =(
but luckily the main part of the ring is still with me.

sigh... bad luck.
it was a bday gift frm mr lys =((

*
i also feel abit sad that my ex schoolmate/s (im not saying who!) are like, not friends (me, maybe i have a different opinion on wads a real friend) anymore.
even tho we see each other rather often, but... i just can tell that... aiyah.. lets just say that its gone with the wind.
i feel sad, but i know i'll feel nothing soon coz tho friendships are impt to me, i will not continue to give if i feel nothing from the other party.
mean, huh?
im selfish.
its to protect myself.

ps: im craving for butter crab!

anti dbs

2006-07-16T21:42:00.000+08:00

tmd nbclc!!

i freaking hate DBS!!
i shall settle the nonsense tomorow and give them a piece of my mind!

*
it was a great weekend tho, steamboat, mahjong, mache with mich tay, plus sunny fun, volleyball, frisbee throwing & beach soccer at sentosa, cut my hair .. lucky i had some good old laughter to last me for awhile, if not my blood vessels might have alredy burst!

*rolls eyes*

i pray to God i get that job, and that mich tay gets it too and we can work tog!
pleaseeeeeeeeee...

pirates of the carribean - dead man's chest

2006-07-13T22:29:00.000+08:00

finally, my long awaited movie! the movies these days dont seem to be to my liking :(

johnny depp does not disppoint me, he is ever the funny man.. or pirate. i was abit confused during the show, maybe coz i was distracted by the irritating noisy girl nx to me (i like my theatre quiet, unless its laughter time).
but its a worthy show to watch, tho i din expect that kinda ending.. which almost promises another sequel. (but i tink i prefer the 1st show)
i laughed out loud at some parts, but my voice is still hoarse.. i duno why its been this way for some time ever since my chalet!
HINT: stay till the end of the credits roll (tho it tested my patience coz it has a go-to-sleep effect on me)
i stayed coz i read the reviews & it hinted a "split second bonus" after the credits thingy :P
its the 1st time i stayed for so long... (darn it! i din stay for X-men)

alrites.. time to find sth to watch. im meeting michelle [tay] tml for mache's! yays...!!!!

lester's bday pics

2006-07-13T00:06:00.000+08:00

overdue: due to too many photos.

after eating at billy bombers, we went to esplanade to cut the cake.

happy burstday!!

we then headed to watch the final world cup at clarke quay.. had a hard time finding a place where we can sit and watch: that place was deserted on that day!

my lychee martini

we watched halfway and then shywei & rayner wanna go home coz they had to work the day after & we cabbed home.
thats the night when france lost to italy.. =(

ps: been taking midnight cabs recently... beta cut down.

shopping!!

2006-07-12T17:36:00.000+08:00

phew. so freaking tired.
went to jiahui's company for an 'interview'. i waited more than an hr (the room is in use.. sorry abt that.. pls wait for awhile) for a "preliminary round of casual interview that lasted 5.4 minutes.

anyway, i din really mind coz i chatted with jiahui and mindy was there working as well (making calls and i duno what...)
then jia and i went for lunch & she had to go back to work while i headed down to town to hunt for the dress i saw the other day at phuture london :P

i was so thirsty when i reached orchard, but i decided to make a beeline for the shop. i spent nearly one hr in there, deciding between the beige & white dress and i got the former. almost bought the black cropped pants as well (looks so darn good!!!), but its quite expensive for just a pair of pants =(

really, orchard road is full of interesting stuff.
as i passed by the marriott hotel, a caucasian "excuse me"ed me & i turned ard.

man: urm.. i was thinking if you could have a drink with me..
me: ........
man: just one drink *holds a finger up*
me: er.. sorry im in a rush...
man: serious?!
me *fingers crossed*: ermm.. sorry!

and i dashed off.

like i told baoqi (who thought that i went into the hotel...), the westerners are usually ok with accepting a drink or two from strangers. if i werent an asian i wud prolly have said "sure!" (pronouced as shurrr) & gone for that drink.

im conservative after all.

and then i met this guy at the bus stop. he flashed a card, and i thought he wanted to sell me sth and i just waved my hand, indicating 'NO'.
then i looked at him and realized he is not just any old guy.. he looked.. different and behaved differently. he came back to me and this time i read his card.
it said that he's a hyperactive guy and the card says not to give him any money as he has it, but to try and guide him home and the address is written too.
sadly, i dunno the directions and i asked other ppl for help but they duno too and my bus came... and i got on.
baoqi said that im bad to go off, but he doesnt understand my gestures and i keep playing the hand pointing game with him... to no avail.

sorry, hyperactive guy.
din help you.

*
i managed to use all but one of the bags given to me alredy.. good huh? *winks*

happy happy 21st bday to me!

2006-07-12T02:18:00.000+08:00

my birthday is officially over, and i really enjoyed it :)

i camped over at mr lys's hse yest nite & accidentally exposed his lil secret.... which is a present for me!
hwahahhahwa.. he is so silly to hide it at the window area; i lifted my head and saw a boxy thing & asked him..

me: is that my present?
mr lys: .... no....
me: haha!! it IS my present!
mr lys: *covers face*
me: *guffaws*

hehe.. he had wanted to hide it there so that when we were in his room, i wudnt see it since i had no reason to draw the curtains as he usually pulls them to shield us frm the sunlight.
so funny lar.. laughed like mad.

anyway, he made me wait till 12 midnight (with a glum face, with his plan exposed) till he went down and got 3 mini cakes frm bakerzinn for me :)

i really din expect this..

he then played a card game with me, with clues on each card, guiding me to the "secret" place where i wud "find" my present ;P
i played along tho i knew where the gift was... i really appreciate all that silly antics from him.

my gift turned out to be a timeless guess bag with a matching wallet. ive always wanted to get a new wallet & he got a really pretty one for me, and the bag is a good sized one too :)
he also presented me with a flower that cud... ahem.. play what he recorded verbally for me :)
plus the bday card that he recorded too..
really really love the effort u put in for me!

a very happy girl he made me.

he slept soon after and i continued watching the telly till the wee hrs & i really wanna thank those who msg-ed me a happy bday :)
we slept through lunch the day after =X

preparing to go! wanted to go wakeboarding but i was so freaking lazy and we din.. turned out the weather wasnt so good anyway (excuses)
we went to east coast to snack and stroll instead.

man! the wind was so strong it tangled my freshly brushed hair & the sand hit my calves with such force! we decided to seek shelter at the hawker: fried kueh tiao & bbq wings! YUM!

scary..

my handsome hunk

we then went to this Blue Lobster seafood resturant near the east coast that he reserved beforehand :)

starters: foie gras
super expensive, but super nice.. but i wonder if its true that ppl stuff the goose with food so that its liver bloats and then they get the foie gras... if it is.. i shall stop eating it!
ps: i hate the baby cresse that came with it tho.. stinks!

mine: pan fried monkfish loin
really yummy! i LOVE mashed potato.. & asparagus!

mr lys's: grilled spiced black cod
delectable! love the tofu that came with my all time favourite codfish! superb!

dessert: valrhona chocolate fondant
the chocolate inside was a lil too bitter, but it'll grow on you (or me) eventually. yum! love the strawberry.

i like!

ambience: 7/10
food: 7.5/10
value for moolah: 7/10
service: 6.5/10

i got one of the main dish free coz it was my bday :)
hurray! the perks of being the bday girl....

really enjoyed my lovely dinner with one of my fav persons in the world.

we headed to PS later on coz rayner called me to say that the gang wud be meeting to eat in Giraffe, somewhere ive been wanting to visit.

we had...

this!
chicken something.. with fries. we oso orded semi-dried tomato bread & a plate of wedges... (talking abt wedges.. there is this pair i wanna buy so badly)
rayner and i actually ordered the food for the latecomers coz we were alredy very full frm our dinner & the last order for food was at 10pm.. & we had a few drinks too, tho rayner ordered this yucky drink "coz the name sounds sophisticated". the taste was too sophisticated for us, i reckon.
im only posting this food photo coz the rest of the pics are blurrrr :(

ambience: 8/10
food: 7/10
value for moolah: 8.5/10
service: 8/10

special tks to rayner, baoqi & lester who came to accompany me in the final hrs of ~~my being 20 yrs old~~ my bday. they even bought a delicious mini mango cake to surprise me at the L-O-V-E sculpture opposite Giraffe and sang me a bday song :)
(nice, but soiled my guess bag that THEY gave me)

tks guys.. appreciate it very much. tks for always being there :)

the world cup is over.. and so is my bday.
bye till the nx time.

pictures of my 21st bday

2006-07-10T16:15:00.000+08:00

frm left: von (who disappeared to nowhere), jy (who yaked), jin (who yaked), me

frm left: jiajia, evonne, mindy, joan, angela, mich
i really hope we remain as knitted as we were physically close to one another

they dun mind getting sweaty for me :~(
frm left: aunt joyce, me, aunt leng

my BBQ helpers
frm left: ster, hongyi, me, kang, izon, mervin

my photographer (uncle) sneaked up on me when i was opening one of the presents :P

me and my moo moo bday cake :D

my family potrait
love love!

pri sch friends
frm left: richmond, jiahui, xiuliang (they go back a looooooong way)

secondary sch bunch
frm left to right: all my friends
(i swear i resized them to the same sizes but some turned out smaller than the rest coz of the original size. sorry, squeeze abit!)

poly peeps
frm left: iadians
how come they duno how to pose 1?? so unbalanced..

my 'outside' friends
frm left: suzhan, ah soon (elder bro of weiwei), weiwei ( younger bro of ah soon), yawen (gf of ah soon), xiuyun (gf of weiwei)

my amore friends
frm left: michelle tan, phoebe, michelle tay (im kinda touched that she doesnt mind my sweaty skin at all, and brushed it off with a never mind!! :)
and me mich in front, of coz

the friend's friend who became my friend group
me and jinny

my pastamania friends
frm left: hongyi, richmond

the botak gang and i
frm left: hongyi & izon (the grumpies), jason & isk (the smilies)

last but not least, my boyfriend, mr lys :)
tks for everything; frm skipping 2 soccer matches to fetching my family peeps to cleaning up the chalet, to entertaining my guests to being my bf.

there are more pictures frm my camera, and i suppose frm my friends', but my uncle's SLR alredy put my digicam to shame. his pictures turned out so much nicer than mine, hence i decided to just use his :)

thank you for making my bday 'party' a success :)

my 21st

2006-07-10T04:01:00.000+08:00

:)

it is my busiest bday celebration to date. (tho technically speaking, its not my bday.. its lester's!)

HAPPY 20TH BDAY LESTER HAN!!

but coz its abt my bday chalet.. im going to have to push the bday boy aside... make way for me:

i really appreciate what my family did for me; the backstage people who dont want credit, pushing me, the lead for the night to shine.
and i tink i shone very much indeed, esp my T-zone as i went abt welcoming ppl & bye-ing ppl.
thanks to all my friends who took time to came (turned out many bothered to come, and for a fleeting moment, i thought only jinny, rayner, ys & i would celebrate my bday... there we were playing mahjong & playing cards.)
your presence, without the presents, are alredy more than good enough.

sadly, some ppl made their point loud and clear by not bothering to reply my msgs, or to turn up when they said they would (no courtesy to even send a simple msg to say that they are not coming. tsk tsk!)
rongsen & kangfu called me personally to apologize for not being able to attend my chalet and maybelline sms-ed me a bday song, and i really appreciate it.
really, i've come to realized whats impt, and of coz, whats not ;)
gimme quality over quantity anytime.

it wudnt be true if i said i really wanted ppl to buy loads of presents for me, but i wud be a downright hypocrite if i said im not happy with my loot.
most of the presents i recieved are thoughtful & some reflect their take on my personality & also based on our relationships ;P

frm the lingerie (i like!!!) & tees frm the playful jias & mindy, to the carefully chosen gift of "chai bao" (guess bag, my fav... and they went all over hunting for the perfect 1) & zara top (i'll try to slim down lar, NB!) frm rayner & baoqi.
i love the borders card evonne & jiajia got for me (so very me, & i dig the design of the card), the black adidas bag isk gave me (its so very handy), the perfume (CK summer! love!) shy, izon, may & edna, the very super cute CK euphoria frm weimin, the cheeky boxers & lil pig frm jason (ahem!!), the SK diamond necklace frm vish, suzhan, baikai, shuli, yawen & ah soon, the cute personalized box of dragonfly necklace frm ster & kang, hair clips & necklace frm xiuliang, the customised green necklace frm yvonne & jiayin, the black bag frm weiwei & xiuyun, mr bean bear frm richmond, lovely goldheart earrings frm phoebe, mich tay/tan, linda & daph, the pink puma polo tee & erm.. book (i bet they chose it coz of the picture of the see-through blouse of the girl) frm chris & mervin, mrs fields cookies frm alvin, the itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow seashell-ed bikini (i love the design, the color!) frm jinny, the esprit bag frm claudia, eugene, huiping, renting & elsie, and the very last min present (choc) frm zhiming & alex, right down to muji's pizza delivery, and did i leave anyone out? scold me if i did; im going by memory!
also, thanks to those who wished me a happy bday (tho its not yey my bday so im still 20 yrs old) :)

of coz, i really love and appreciate the presents given to me by my family... the moo moo cake, necklaces, watch, ang pows & a big fat bag of love.
im sorry if my guests din enjoy themselves or felt left out or anything negative, but there is only one me (hvn quite mastered the kage bun shino jutsu), and so many of them.
my legs hurt at the end of the day (frm all that walking here and there) when everyone left . but it was fun and memorable :)
in fact, it was so overwhelming that i cudnt get to slp till daylight (ys snoring in one room, jiayin meowing in the room i slept in, coz the rest din stay after all). many thoughts were going through my mind...
words cant say what love can do..

pictures will be up nx time..
but i have a question: how come all my bags frm me friends are in either black or white?
dahahahaha!! i hope its not coz they tink im *gasp* boring!

its the world cup finals today..& i m not watching it for some reason.. im just walking outta the room to check on the score now and then :(

really hope france wins. that wud be a good bday present :P

*edited*
france lost to italy during the penalty shootout :(
bummer.
naughty zidane; headbutt ppl!!

FRANCE plays ITALY AT WORLD CUP FINALS

2006-07-06T04:57:00.000+08:00

wad a game!!
it was unlucky for portugal who has to go home while the frenchmen move forward to take on italy in the world cup finals.
henry secured a penalty kick which zidane took and scored!
poor portugal... they really tried their hardest to fight back, but it was a neck to neck game.
zidane had a really good chance to head in a goal but it wasnt to be :(

byebye portugal.. well done! both team have done well... im so darn proud of them!! i ohh-ed and ahh-ed at the right times & had goosebumps breaking out during anxious moments.

i cant wait to see the final.. but its so sad that word cup is ending soon.. a once a 4 yrs event!!! gosh..

what a match...!
*applauses*

cut myself :(

2006-07-06T01:06:00.000+08:00

clumsy is my middle name

claudia's bday pics

2006-07-05T18:19:00.000+08:00

claud only sent me 4 pictures, and im not going to post the one thats so blur, with renting walking into the photo by accident.

this is abit blur :(
the white pretty & ugly me (how come i look tanned in the picture when i look 'fair' in real?)

girl power
dont we look like the chocolate cake, and claudia the white candle?

a rather candid picture

:)

spazzy mich

2006-07-04T18:10:00.000+08:00

:(

im so freaking clusmy. when i removed the gold necklace my dad gave me last night, the thing snapped. i duno how, but i din even exert alot of strength!
then i looked through my old necklaces & found another broken white gold chain frm tianpo, i tink, given to me by my aunt.
then i remember snapping the necklace given to me by my poly friends for my bday last year the day they gave it to me.
wad the hell...

dont ever gimme necklaces or anthing delicate! i'll destroy them all!

i guess i'll just bring the lot for repair... i dont wanna tell my dad, who is going off to thailand tonight, that the chain's broken! i gotta get it fixed asap.. wad a klutz i am.

fullerton dinner

2006-07-04T01:52:00.000+08:00

mich & mich
love the food! love the place! yum yum tiramisu on spoons!

outside fullerton, near the rotating door

photowhores

all of us

lil charmine insisted on getting into the picture

smile smile smile!

lined up neatly with phoebe (who is getting married this sep) in front

love love!

my first 21st bday present

2006-07-03T22:10:00.000+08:00

thank you, dad.

*
this girl is amazing.

claud's 21

2006-07-02T22:54:00.000+08:00

it was claudia's bday celebration on friday night. (im not very used to calling her claudia... but she hates her chinese name)

anyway, it was great meeting up with my old friends (esther - can smell the new york smell, lynnette - my history class partner, piggy peh - my fellow bandmate, huiping -my pri sch fren, wanwu - sun god, & the rest) who ive not seen in ages.
its good to have good guests (like me) who mingle around & ahem.. behave themselves & have a good time.. eat and drink and laugh.

im rather irritated sometimes... by my own bday thingy. i shall not elaborate, but hope that all goes well.

if no one turns up i shall eat the whole cake myself.

ps: brazil lost 0-1 to france!
good on henry for scoring!

world cup

2006-07-02T02:40:00.000+08:00

omg!!!

england vs portugal
0-0
but portugal won the penalty shootout!!!!

rooney was sent off the field (for stepping on ppl's privates accidentally & then pushing ronaldo from england, but his team mate frm man U)
it was a crazy penalty shootout, and sadly for england, they lost! poor beckham injured his foot & poor the rest of the team.
but well done portugal! move on!

watched the germany vs argentina match yest & i quite forgot what i wanted to say, as my memory is stale frm yest.
but its a 0-0 score, with germany winning the penalty shootout.
and boo boo to both teams for wanting to fight after the match..

im not a diehard fan, and its been ages since i last watched a match, but its really great watching soccer games (esp World Cup matches) together with so many ppl (at PS, at the front seats; courtest of richmond, tho i got rather pissed off at some ppl who gave so much nonsensical comments abt lousy players... go play for them if ur so bloody good lar, dude!)
anyway, i "supported" argentina & england but they both lost :P
(i had hoped germany & portugal would score oso)
i mean, if its club vs club, im certain i like arsenal (real madrid as well), but when it comes to country, i cant make up my mind who to support coz i tink they are all great & its so sad to see them heartbroken when they lose the chance to bring glory to their country.

its amazing to see the hot favourites up against one another.. brazil is next, against france at 3am!
i like ronaldinho frm brazil, but there is henry frm france too...
ahhhhh too bad i cant watch coz ys has SCV, but it doesnt support the soccer programmes!
nvm.. i can go to sleep earlier then.. and pray that the better team wins.
whoever it is.

gogogo!! ah le ah le ah le!!!
GOAL!!

zhang ziyi

2006-06-30T14:02:00.000+08:00

i just finished watching a documentry on zhang ziyi's road to fame & success. i have always admired her for her beauty & talent, but after watching the telly, i think ive more reasons than that to admire her.

she is sucha accomplished dancer, reason being she was trained the tough way since young, and worked doubly hard to ensure she could keep up with the rest of the class.. knowing that she is just 'average' in her class, she'll work hard in the dark just for extra pratice.
she is so versatile; put her in maid's clothes & she'll still look lovely, dress her up & she'll look stunning, she excels in any role thrown at her..

she may not have super high cheekbones & lush eyelashes above wide set eyes, i think she is truly an asian beauty.

despite what critics may say, im sure she got to where she is by working hard (tho being pretty, having a delicate frame & possessing charisma really help alot), & hats off to her! (she looks younger than she actually is too!!) even if she is a prima donna, it is undeniable that she's a huge success, so there!

what am i doing? watching ppl on telly and being a potato couch? hikes!

TCC at boat quay

2006-06-30T01:31:00.000+08:00

im back frm a couple of drinks with baoqi, rayner, lester & jiayin.
all of us (me included, despite being jobless) were rather tired, yet its delightful to meet up nevertheless. surprising, jiayin appeared to be the most energetic one tonight... :P

after a shiok day at my aunt's place(playing mahjong, having high tea, being taitai-ish), i headed down to town to meet my friends. we skipped the teh tarik ice cream part, but i'll leave it till nx time!
we hung out at TCC (curse the group of 2 who occupied the big red sofas meant for us group of 5) & 'lelec'.
pictures are with the camera ppl... send me plz.

.pray hard.

fond memories

2006-06-27T16:05:00.000+08:00

im supposed to be cleaning my room; the aftermath of working & neglecting my room is a terrible sight to behold.

anyway, ive officially quitted my job. ive gotta pay a small price for it, but i think its worth it.

i may be going to jiahui's company for interview, and i may go for the JAL interview.
evonne, the height requirement is 158m... are u at least 1.58m? if yes, we can go together.. tho you'll decrease my chance, but thats what friends are for.. i guess.

i digressed.
i was saying.. im supposed to be cleaning me room, but i logged on to hotmail and started sending my friends the invitation to my bday chalet which is in 2 weeks' time. i think i did not send everyone i intended to invite coz i either dun have their emails or contact.
im rather nervous abt my bday (a.k.a big day)
what if no one turns up?
what if i get the runs?
what if my armpits start to stink & my pimples start to pop?

i surfed though friendster & read the old testimonials ppl gave me. alot of ppl say that those testis are fake. of coz some are hypocritical, but i'll like to believe that some are real too.
then i start thinking abt the times when my friends were so sweet to me; celebrating my bday for me, believing in me when i applied for the SQ interview, cheering me up when i din make it, springing a surprise on me by visiting me during my lunch hour when i mentioned in passing that i had to lunch alone during one of my jobs, informing me abt job opportunities, & loads more.
you know who you are.

maybe you dont, but it doesnt matter.. coz i know.

these are the traits july babies are supposed to have. i'll mark those that i think are true in green, those that im doubtful of in grey, and those untruths in red.

Fun to be with.
Secretive. (dont tell you)
Difficult to fathom and to be understood.
Quiet unless excited or tensed.
Takes pride in oneself.
Has reputation (have la, but good or bad i duno!)
Easily consoled.
Honest.
Concerned about people's feelings.
Tactful.
Friendly.
Approachable.
Emotional temperamental and unpredictable.
Moody and easily hurt.
Witty and sparkly.
spazzy at times.
Not revengeful.
Forgiving but never forgets.
Dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things.
Guides others physically and mentally.
Sensitive and forms impressions carefully.
Caring and loving.
Treats others equally.
Strong sense of sympathy.
Wary and sharp.
Judges people through observations.
Hardworking.
No difficulties in studying. (that's a good one)
Loves to be alone. (but not too long plz)
Always broods about the past and the old friends.
Waits for friends. (coz they are always late)
Never looks for friends.
Not aggressive unless provoked.
Loves to be loved. (who doesnt?)
Easily hurt but takes long to recover.

hehe.. just for fun. i really need to clean me room now.

bout of bad luck?

2006-06-26T20:56:00.000+08:00

looks like i got happy too early...
dun want to say too much.. just hope that everything blows over & i'll be on the right track again.
its partly my fault actually for rushing into this (stupid) job.

thank god mr lys is with me...

cant wait to meet my friends again..
i got a taste of what it feels like to laugh (after sucha long time of being prim and proper during work) so hard that tears well up in me eyes.
met my ex-amorians at fullerton for the seafood buffet that the EP branch won (for 5 pax) for being the "Best Branch 2005".
sadly tho, the team has split up; mas's gone long ago, im gone, daph's gone, phoebe's transferred to bugis, linda's joining phoebe soon, & what's left of the team is michelle tay & the new girl meiling.

i miss working at amore so much... tho frm what i heard of the new 'rules' by the new 'head', its not fun anymore. stupid me for leaving so early and subjecting myself to such... treachery!!!!
arghhhhh..
oh. i was saying.. the food was lovely! the best part was dessert; so "dainty" :)
yummy yummy!
my stomach bloated to such *brobdingnagian dimensions & i could hardly walk properly after that.

*new word i just learnt. it means gigantic.

very happy today, despite my bout of bad career luck. baby tried to cheer me up. we went out for dinner & he brought me to cosy bay to stoll along the waters & we danced on the bridge & i enjoyed the breeze, the scenery, and of coz his company.

we played the word game.

eg.
si gua de gau ah...
gua zhi de zhi ah..
zhi hui de hui ah..
hui shou de shou ah..
shou zhang de zhang ah..
zhang da de da ah...
and so on.

me: yin du (india) de du ah...
lys: du lan (dulan!) de lan ah...
me: buAhahwHAHhahahhaAHhaha!

after that, we headed for the carpark & 2 men (with an accent) approached us for directions to the mrt which is quite a distance away. mr lys offered to drive them there & they thanked us profusely..
feels so good to be appreciated.. and i think my dear mr lys feels even better to do sth good.

im hoping that those 2 are some high ranking ppl of some company & that they'll somehow take me in their company to be the board of director or sth :)

*dream dream dream*

got my pay!!!!!!!!!!!! ^_^

2006-06-24T15:04:00.000+08:00

yays i got my pay! so early.. shd have been on monday.
i feel happy that my account is fed.
seems like i got paid for doing pretty nothing much :P

i feel like i have no heart to work anymore, since i have more or less made up my mind to leave. my only regret is to waste the time of my 'teacher' Felicia who has been guiding me patiently.
im sorry...!
but i cant leave just yet.. gotta wait for the reply from the company i sent my resume to.
bleah!!!!!!!!
its the end of my training in tampines and its really so much fun after getting to know the girls and everything. but we have to part to lead our seperate lives in the same company..

talking abt friends...

i got to know this pretty girl Izan during the training. she is always smiling, and she has a happy face. her smiles seem to light up the room & she is funny & cute.
imagine my shock when she told me she was anorexic.
she's much better now, and i think her weight is healthy for her. but she said she went from 70+kg to 48kg in just one month! its really a drastic change, and emotionally taxing too. she refused to eat meat and she slowly lost her pretty hair. it was the shocking loss that prompted her to recieve treatment. she is slowly recovering, but still forces herself to puke (bulimic) sometimes when she feels that she has eaten too much. its disheartening to hear that. she is beautiful to me, but chooses to see herself as FAT FAT FAT.

that made me think abt why so many people are discontent with themselves.
sometimes i cant tell who are the really unhappy ones; those who grin and bear it usually suffer quite alot.

i used to LOATHE this mole on my left lower arm. i hate it so much i wud wear my watch to cover it. and the mole is just off center (of my arm). imagine how ugly it was, my watch halfway up my arm. i wud pick at the offending mole till it bled, hoping against hope that it wud bleed, drop off and disappear.
but it didnt.
i was so concious of this mole that i became rather upset. (but not depressed)
(btw, that was during my primary sch days)

later (dunno when), slowly but surely, i came to accept it.
the mole is not hideous after all. its not even big, nor with a hair sticking out, and i think its cute now. (buahahaha!) really!
we ARE allowed to feel inferior at times.
dont i feel fat at times? dont i feel pimply? dont i feel like my hair is just a bush of tangled mess? dont i have my insecurities?
yes yes yes yes yes.
but wallow too long in your sorrows and soon you become a pain in the a*s.

we all have flaws and its usually the owner who cannot accept them.
what to say?
life is short.
count our blessings!

ps: im usually happy.. but sometimes you really disappoint me. yes, i have expectations, but they are not high, and yet you cant even try meet them. we cannot forever stay stagnant in our comfort zone. you can really be unreasonable at times but no matter what i say, you dont register that. i dont know to sigh in exasperation or cry with grief. how do i type out my sigh? 'haiz' is not good enough.

Full to the Brim

2006-06-20T21:44:00.000+08:00

rayner, send me ur bday pictures!

another year has passed. (this statement is technically true, even tho its not the end of the year, for it has been a year since the same day and month last year, no?) ppl grow older, wiser (not all, apparently) & richer coz they have started working.
i went to meet rayner, jiayin & baoqi for steamboat dinner (courtesy of rayner, thank you very much) on sat for his bday celebration & tho the place is rather cramped & everyone seemed to be in haste, the food wasnt half bad.
we then headed to his grandma's huge mansion to await kang & stir & shy.
the mansion is really cool; with a basement & 3 levels. his neighbours' houses... i mean, bungalows are really impressive too.
love the cosy basement the most... coz i din visit the rest of the house.
played pool, acted like i was in the bar, watched tv, played bridge (it seems like only my poly friends amongst other friends know how to play that!!), sang bday song, cut & ate cake & gave ray our presents.
hope he likes them all.

*
im really a job hopper. i hvn lasted more than 4 mths for any of my previous jobs (continously) & im ashamed to say that, but its true :(
im in the 3rd week at my new job & im tinking of quitting & joining jiahui's company :P
i shall see how it goes; once she explains to me in detail abt it.
i have my reasons for leaving DBS, so i shall not feel guilty... lalala..

ahem.. im so bloated now. went to suntec to have the buffet at Kuishindo with mr lys just now. its quite funny; they play this circus-like music whenever a 'counter' is about to give out certain foods to only the 1st few customers and they annouce it and everyone rushes over to try to grab some.

eg.
*music*
PA system: "ladies & gentlemen, we now have strawberry mochi icecream for the first 3o customers.. head to the dessert counter now.."

*mad rush*

me (wolfing down sashimi): i...*burp*.. want...!
mr lys: over there... faster go queue ..
me: but.. i... aiya.. no more le la.. so many people queue...

and then i proceeded to sulk.
but we did manage to get the spicy lobster the 1st time & oso my cotton candy :P

so full i couldnt walk properly, and i din even eat alot :(
we had loads of sashimi, some snow crabs, sukiyaki, lil tibits of this & that, chocs, cakes, and the lovely choco fondue, & etc.
i love to eat...
hope someone buys X-trim & U-zap for me.

nvm.
i bought a bra at blush! today! at only $8.. and i din noe that the usual price is $69.90 till i saw the reciept. sheesh.
i almost bought the hair curler thingy today at courts. i can do at least 6 different curls with it but it was so horrible; no one offered to assist me, and i cud not find a single soul to explain to me how the product works/ compare brands, and i decided not to buy it there.
pui.

hope tml will be a better day (than today) for everyone.thoughts are running through my mind and yet i know not what to say..

happy 20th bday to rayner!

2006-06-19T18:07:00.000+08:00

eHAPPY BDAY RAY!e

(as on 17th june)

will update more later...

happier days

2006-06-15T21:57:00.000+08:00

its a pity.. im disappointed with some of the pictures coz i took those in d dark; i dont encourage flash during photo-taking.
but i took many nice pics in the dark without flash and photoshopping those turned out.. not really nice.

anyway... i had a really good time with mr lys. i really lOVEEEEEEEE the times spent with him; just as long as we dont start bickering.
ahem.. we spent 3 days in KL. we stayed in the federal hotel (we wanted captitol.. but NA) its really near sungei wang and everywhere... just like the radius hotel where i stayed the previous time with my friends.

radius hotel = R
federal hotel = F
shopping area = S

R-----------x----------S

F

so its all near each other.. and in between R & S, ive indicated an X which stands for the place where jiayin did the skater girl thing :P
its like walking down memory lane when i strolled along the streets i onced walked with my friends just 4 months? ago... but it seemed like years ago! =(

im posting very few pictures..

the room we got.. we demanded for a change...

there! much better, ainnit?

i introduced the very good bat kut teh to mr lys: he loves it!
i tink its really really yummy! we tried the bat kut leh across our hotel but it doesnt even come near!

i cannot give the curly fries a miss if i can help it

me & mr lys

we went to the top story of our hotel where a rotating restaurant awaits our arrival. we had a couple of drinks there the 1st night and decided to go back for the dinner the night after.

his choice: kaluah
its really tiny, dont be fooled!

my choice: frozen margarita
i tink its aptly named.

the place is rather romantic albeit not as professional & high-class as the one in singapore. but its affordable.
the food is not fantastic, tho the atmosphere more than makes up for it... aside from one incident:
the waiter poured my mushroom sauce over my beek steak hotplate and all the tiny angry hot sauce jumped at me, stinging my skin :(

we spent quite some time there, talking abt us: the past, present & future while watching the world go round and round - literally - as the twin towers appeared and disappeared from view.

i miss the times when i was much younger, and nth bothered me. my duty was to eat and sleep and learn the strokes of the chinese characters.. but we cannot linger, for time does not permit so.
its time for me to be independant and contribute to my family (omg i have to repay $100 to my dad each mth for the nyp thingy)

still, i dread deaths...
i really pray hard each night.
am i depressed or what?
only heaven knows.

shopping queen

2006-06-15T19:25:00.000+08:00

alrite, im not really a super shopping queen, but like most girls, i do enjoy it.
thats one bad thing abt working at parkway... step out there and the funds follow suit.

ive my eyes on a few items; after i get my pay... hehe.. but maybe i'll get them after my 2nd pay (if i last that long *gulps*)

#1
white adidas 3/4 pants, damage = $69?
(i tink that look great! just spotted them today)

#2
anna sui dolly girl, damage = $40-60?
(mr lys said i have one too many perfumes alrdy)

#3
chanel precision moisturizer, damage = $98!!
(i love the cream so much... but it doesnt come cheap... yet it smells and works great!)

#4
hair rollers so i can get curly hair in minutes!
(this, im definately going to get, but its not available in the best denki at parkway, only at taka, i heard)

i suppose i have a few more items on my wanted list, but that will do. i wanna have my lovely dinner now.

ps: a shame im not into the world cup mood now that i have to spend so many hrs at work... arghhhhhhhh

michelle's believe it or not!!

2006-06-14T22:56:00.000+08:00

before i post the pictures, i'll like to highlight a few things that happened today.
being rather adaptable, im getting used to work in the bank. my tolerance level is higher, now that i get myself at least 6 hrs of sleep. woe betide me should i clock any less than that.

#believe it or not 1
anyways, a most extraordinary thing happened today. i heard my colleagues talking about "baby fainting...breathless... in the treasures section..." and as a highly curious being, i wondered whose baby fainted. but i posed no questions as i was rather groggy in the morning.
later in the day, i found out that the 'baby' was a 84 yr old grandmother. her christian name is... Baby.
dont laugh. she died today.
i heard that she came into our branch today after eating a curry puff from old chang kee, and then later coughed quite a bit and i duno if she choked, or had a stroke, but she turned pale and fainted and my manager (im tempted here to give my manager a nickname, but of coz, the internet is not a very private thing, innit?) called the ambulance & she was sent to the changi hospital, but died later in the day. story is that she wasnt immediately attended to, and was in fact made to wait for quite awhile.
its tragic... had help been delivered sooner, she may have not died. she's an old rich lady, but sadly she died in the most unexpected way.
im gonna take a break from old chang kee for awhile now.
may the old lady (i cant bring myself to call her Baby) rest in peace.

#believe it or not 2
on a lighter note...
guess who i saw today?
as i went to the counter after lunch, i saw my "buddy" felicia attending to this guy. i was taken aback as he seemed soooooo familiar. i felt like ive seen him somewhere before. but i kept my cool, yes sir i did.
next, when i glanced down at his name on the deposit slip, my heart skipped a beat.

RONALD SUSILO

geezy horsey!!! ronald susilo!! ive seen that face on tv lahhhhh! eh, quite handsome, toned, and very rich!! whahahhaa!! (ahem, for those who duno him.. he is the famous indonesian-born singapore badminton player)
ahem, anyway, he was depositing $$ for himself & Li Jiawei ;)
i cud see where he have been to (place, dinner, etc) with the bill he came to pay for, but i shall not be unprofessional and divulge it here.
and felicia din even had a clue who she was serving till i told her, explaining that she doesnt watch the sports channel, therefore she cudnt regonize his face tho his name did ring a bell -.-"

trivial: after work today, baby (my baby ys, not the poor old lady) came and fetched me :)
we went to suntec and east coast & i really had a good time laughing so hard and so much... it makes my day to end the day (no matter how shitty) with a big hearty laugh with ppl i love... and i laughed my exhaustion away..

#believe it or not 3
alrites, i gotta hit the sack soon, so im gg post the pics frm my grad ceremony now!
believe it or not, i graduated!

becoz i dont have enough energy to post other pictures during the ceremony, and coz its my blog, i shall post all photos with my face (hwahhahaha)

perry the guide to many, & me

jason & me
(jason: all the best to ur army life!)

weimin & me

jiayin, liyana & me

serene and me

dan and me

this is good... keith the brilliant & me (dont mind my weak knees... its his aura)

our director, moses

back in the good old studio with rayner & baoqi

i enjoyed my poly days with my friends... i will miss some ppl :(

mr friendly; KK & me

its been a truly thrilling, exhausting, happy, stressful journey. i thank the ppl who have been with me through the ups & downs & i will not forget them *cries*
i wanna say more, but i dont tink im doing justice to my speech in this haste, so till next time...

perry sent a grp of us to takashimaya (he's meeting his wife) after the ceremony & then we went to have dinner together... perry is so nice!

some friends are like the plates that held the good food ive eaten; colorful, supportive, different, and yet when they come together with me, they fit perfectly... i love.

ps: i have pics frm KL, but i'll leave those till the nx entry.

sad start

2006-06-12T19:13:00.000+08:00

congrats to me! my com is finally fit for use.
turned out that my monitor's spoilt, and ys changed his old one for me (tho im impatient abt the 5 minutes warm-up-then-not-blur screen)

ive been missing out on so much ever since i stopped coming online, and i miss typing on my keyboard!!!
so mannnnnnnnny things happened since the last time i blogged (KL trip, movies, outings, birthdays) and i duno where to start. will post overdue pictures when im less tired...

im so freaking drained!!
i started work last week on the 5th and ive been at the dbs training center for the past week, and now im attached to the branch.
being in the training center is like filling my brain with so much info that i liken it (my brain) to a sponge, and at times i felt like i could absorb no more. there's just too much things to learn.
being that the branch is a different thing altogther.
becoz my training is half completed, im not allowed to open a counter myself and a poor girl has the bad luck to have me stick to her like a leech for however-long-it-takes-to-complete-my-training. i just sit beside and watch what she does: its the ultimate boringest boring thing in the whole wide world. (the most interesting but horrible thing that happened today was when an unreasonable customer scolded one girl)
i dont get enough sleep and my attention span is not long enough to do nothing and my eyelids are always so heavy and i wanna quit!!!
muahahhaha.. i know.. its not even half a month into my new work, but sometimes i really wonder what the hell im doing there at the counter... its not me; sitting at the counter doing nothing.
:(

i guess its my fault for rushing into getting this job without considering other options... :(
arghhhhhhhhhh!
i really feel so lost... i know i probably can last for awhile more.. but deep down inside, i know this is not a long term job for me. baby told me not to complain and "just do it" and yadda yadda, but when i lie on my bed at night, exhausted from doing nth, i weep inside.
i just cannot stand around.. OK! sit around doing nothing, waiting for the time to knock off. i like to idle, but not during work!!! and for such long periods of time!!!!

i shd have studied harder during my secondary school days.
i really regret it now.
help!!!!!!!!!!!!

6/6/6

2006-06-05T19:30:00.000+08:00

666

its my graduation ceremony.... spells doom or what?

happy 21st bday, Jason

2006-06-01T22:15:00.000+08:00

aMANY HAPPY RETURNS a

eeeee*throws confetti in the air* eeeee

fucking losers burn in hell

2006-05-28T20:25:00.000+08:00

a fight today during soccer.

i was so mad, vuglarities spew forth like there's no tomorrow. i almost 'phoenix-ed', if you get my drift. (think jean grey! duh!)
i was happily talking to yawen who was there as well when suddenly, hell broke loose & ppl started hitting ppl & i heard yawen screaming and i felt the wet mud on me (and i found, to my dismay, my new tee and bag dirty with mud) and hairy legs & backsides and i cudnt see a damn thing but i knew that a fight has ensued.
i was so stunned that i stayed where i was, watching blurish figures with fists punching at whatever/whoever and i din move... till a hand grasped my wrist and pulled me over.
it was a friend of ys's.

only when i stood up did i have a clear view of what was going on: but i still cudnt figure out who was hitting who and then i saw a hideous thing walk up to my ys and push his head. to my surprise, ys just walked off with0ut retaliation.
then i realised that he had been surrounded, punched and kicked earlier by 4-5 even hideous ppl (coz he tried to save suzhan who was beaten to the ground and he delivered a blow to the head to one of the beastiess) and the wind was knocked out of him when one of them aimed at his chest with his boots on, leaving a war-mark on his skin (last part insisted by ys himself)
when i looked up and saw weiwei's badly bruised face, i was shocked and when i realized that he was hit for trying to seperate the fighting ppl, i was livid with rage. i was shaking with anger!!
as the referee tried to stop the fight, i saw that many ppl where injured and i was really mad.

i cannot decribe the feeling i had just now; all i wanna do was to beat the hell outta those stupid, ugly, stupid ugly ppl.

i am appalled. i mean, an bengs are so passe. fuck off and die all sore losers who hit ppl.
ok, sometimes i am a sore loser, esp during wc3, but hey, i dont go ard hitting ppl's faces rite!!?!
fucking brainless ppl who only think brawls are cool and there is this fucked up guy who makes me wanna laugh out when he "coolly" removed his shirt, ready to fight (oH im so scared)

fuck off man knnbccb!!
i am rather mad at myself for not at least giving a good poke in their eyes or something like that. sure, i'll be pummelled to death in 5 seconds if i enter the battlefield, but i'll die trying. tho i said its stupid to fight, (they started the fight coz they cudnt stand to lose in soccer), i will not say no to fighting back if provoked. (unless ur opponent is really huge)

i have another reason to train hard for my kickboxing.

back frm KL but com still down

2006-05-27T23:41:00.000+08:00

my title rhymes!!! (you gotta read it a lil faster, silly)(and im using ys's laptop, if ur wondering)

ahem, anyway, im back. sat on the bus till i almost developed sores in my rear (tee hee...) i have pictures to upload, but i gotta wait till i can use his laptop for long OR my com miraculously recovers. (actually i hvn got home to check, but im not holding my breath)

this time to KL was not as fruitful in terms of my loots as compared to the previous trip tho i really did get some steals (plus i gained a good, i mean bad 5kg), but it was very fun nonetheless. i shall blog more abt it with my pictures.
oh! and we watched X-MEN (the last stand).
o mi gosh! what a wunnerful show!!! i loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeed it.
but i almost weeped at some tragic parts... totally unexpected! really fab! (the show, not the tragic parts)
at 11 ringget per person = $4.80 on a friday night = good deal.
really good show! tho my favourite is still Storm *rolls eyes till only the whites can be seen*, i dont mind having Jean's powers :P

sigh.. when will my computer be revived?

going to KL!

2006-05-24T22:26:00.000+08:00

*pats tummy*

i just wolfed down a cheese bun a gorgeous SQ customer of ours gave us. i nicked 2 and gave one to ys, of coz.

my home computer is really dead now. i mean, its has been virus-ed before, but this time, its really gone bonkers! the screen will go mad & the light will go off & an angry hissing sound scares me into believing that the computer may really explode in my face.
sad, but i can understand why; my computer has been with me since the secondary 4, i think.
*sobs*

this has caused me some inconvinience; i cant go online, i cant blog, cant chat, cant surf, cant do nothing.

grrr... i hope to get it either fixed or changed when im back frm KL on sat.

omg i have so much to say, but im trying to keep it short coz ys is giving me the evil eye as i type.. he is packing our things ( and going 'tsk tsk') while im trying to blog (we're at his place, im using his lappy). give me some peace, man!
anyway, its my last day at amore today and the girsls bought a big ducky marshmallow pillow with a baby duck pillow for me coz they said i seem to like the one phoebe bought and left in amore :)
zank you, ladies!

besides meeting up with bao, ster, ray, kang on sat for ktv, clarke quay, esplanade, da vinci code at suntec (thumbs up, but somewhat different from the novel itself), i caught over the hedge (i loveeeeeeeeeee it) with ys on sunday (suntec), and tried my luck at the donald duck keychain (turning the knob thingy) but i got the same yellow rabbit as bao, but ys tried for me and he got donald duck!!
hehe...

we played badminton at night and i told off the smokers for smoking in toliet, and another bunch oso for smoking right outside the indoor badminton court, causing ME to inhale their rubbish 2nd hand smoke.

omg, im trying my darn hardest to blog abt wad i did, how i feel (for the missing few entries) in as few words as i can and its really bad.
anyway, gtg now.. wanna eat my mango.
be back on sat!

nights out with amore peeps :)

2006-05-17T01:15:00.000+08:00

i just reached home frm east coast & cosy bay.

tho it was enjoyable, the main reason we went out was to cheer michelle (tay) up. her boyfriend of 4 months suddenly broke up with her yest night & she was so upset she cried during work.
seeing the usually bubbly laugh-alot mich cry makes me feel so sad & we decided to go out with her to take her mind off things.

michelle (tan) was supposed to go out with bf but they kindly joined us in the quest of cheering the heartbroken girl.
we went to east coast and ordered quite an amount of food. fedderick (mich tan's bf) paid for most of it & i paid 10 bucks, daph 8 bucks and we din noe who shd pay what and who shd pay more but we dint even care..
we just wanted to be happy.

after eating, joking, laughing, fedderick (actually i really duno how to spell his name) drove us (tks alot, pal) to cosy bay to chill out. we spent awhile there chatting, singing, and the uphappy girl did laugh and all, but i know deep down inside, she is hurting and i feel damn bad to see her like that :((((
before she went alighted frm the car, i gave her a big hug. even tho we keep her company tonight, she will go home feeling empty :(
be strong girl, we love you!

i feel so sorry.
break ups are not always sad affairs, they can be settled amiably and the break is good for both parties, but its always depressing to see ppl cry & hear hearts break; more so if its a friend.

It can happen to Anyone of us
anyone you think of
Anyone can fall
Anyone can hurt someone they love
Hearts will break
'Cause I made a stupid mistake
It can happen to Anyone of us
say you will forgive me
Anyone can fail
Say you will believe me
I can't take my heart will break
'Cause I made a stupid mistake
A stupid mistake

i have made stupid mistakes too, but thank god....

my computer is going crazy... :(

i love my baby.

i wanna go KL again

2006-05-15T22:59:00.000+08:00

a few months ago, i went on my very 1st trip with friends to KL. tho it was a near destination, the company was good; the holiday short & sweet.

im thinking of going back there with deary this month.
we have been to KL together twice, & if circumstances allow it, i would choose to travel to a further place. we thought abt going away for a week (he takes off, i take offs, we take off; literally) but as luck would have it, he has to go to jurong for some swimming thingy on wed, the middle day of the week & therefore ruining the plan.
but being the occasional optimist, i suggested to head to KL for 2 days 1 night of fun as a short break; just the 2 of us.
never mind that i intend to get the pink adidas jacket (that my friends in KL with me shd know; baoqi wanted that adidas bag but the last piece was filthy) that i wanted so much & going to KL will satisfy that lust.
i really hope the jacket's still there waiting for me *hopeful*

i know, my bank account is at an all time low now, & im going to the isetan sale with my aunt/s this thurs somemore! but money earned is meant to be 75% spent & 25% saved.
i insist on following the this rule.

God forgive me for all the sins ive commited :(

super sunday

2006-05-14T23:12:00.000+08:00

happy mothers' day
to all mothers out there :)

i treated my kaima, kaiye & aunt leng to Sun with Moon today. i did not treat the rest of my aunts tho they have been mother figures to me since forever coz they all have their own children.

even so, im really thankful for this family that i have. families are like the support that holds you up when its shaky; they raise you up, but keep ur feet firmly on the ground so that you dont have ur head above the cloud all the time.
the never-wavering support that i so much appreciate, but not really reciprocated (by me). my family may not be perfect, but i love it all the same, and i am very blessed indeed.
i love my folks!
im sorry that i used to be wildful and caused much problems. the directions that i chose to take is my altered course & tho i can return to the straight route & try to open up, its not easy...
some mistakes are not that easy to correct... my bad. i cant describe the guilt that gnaw at me constantly... its my retribution.

i love my aunts, but i wish my kaima would stop being so insensitive. she often repeats the same old thing that hurts me so bad. she keeps telling me that her husband (my godfather) went out with my dad & "at least have somebody to talk to him.."
i know, its my bad that im not on much-speaking terms with my father, but its not what i want, and i duno if she is hinting at me or whatever, but i really feel a thousand knives stabbing at me whenever she reminds me of the unhappy fact.
i just kept quiet and let it pass.

nobody knows how i feel inside & they assume its ok to shoot me.
its not becoz i dun want to explain, but its indescribable :(

but i will keep my chin up.
i will try to improve things between us and i wish ppl will not condemn me coz they dun even know anything... (tho its true that im at fault too)
i will gambatte.

on a happier note, after lunch, they went walking ard for awhile & then we headed back to aunt leng's house. i love her house; not becoz its a condo, but coz its really like a home to me. tho she lives alone, this home of hers is cosy & i feel very happy everytime i visit :)
(its been so many yrs since the 1st time i stepped inside..)
we played mahjong & i won a mighy $2.60 :P
she kindly opened her wardrobe & gave me some of her jackets (darn expensive, those things), pants, tops & bags for my new work. she doesnt need them now that she has retired, but i feel bad abt taking her stuff as they dont come cheap.
but i sure hope her career luck rubs off me. not that its much luck; she worked very very hard.
i owe her so much that i can only repay her if im given 10 lifetimes, and thats only probable.

thinking abt work makes me wanna faint, but im determined to strive hard. i feel abit sorry for her clothes that she wore as a manager and im abt to wear them as a lowly customer service representative, but i really hope that i endure, and carve a niche somewhere... even tho im right at the bottom of the coperate ladder now.
mind over matter! i have goals now. i want to achieve them!!!

we went to have dinner at the market near her hse (yummy fish thingy) and then its homeward bound.
really enjoy the time with my family members :)

isnt love amazing?

:(

2006-05-13T12:51:00.000+08:00

im feeling under-appreciated...
:(

happy bday to XL, Joyce

2006-05-12T23:31:00.000+08:00

i almost gave my childhood friend's 21st bday a miss. lucky i went, and i can slap myself silly if i really had missed it!

i met jy (we've not met for ages) in town, and did major damage to myself. its a taboo i shall not speak of any further.

*
took a cab to coasta sand pasir ris and boy was i giddy *seeing stars*
but having reached there and being able to attend a special night of my beloved friend is worth it after all.

the princess of the night

it was a 21st bday, but it felt more like a wedding celebration. she was so nervous, but she looked gorgeous all the same.

the special cake her friends got for her... i had a piece of her!

caixia, joyce & i
we were all frm the same old primary sch
(dress code was earthly colors, semi formal & many ppl wore white!)

blissful smiles
the boyfriend was so sweet to be the host for his "shy" gf, and then on demand, he sang her a love song in front of everyone & they hugged & kissed *awwwwwwwwww*. i really felt like it was a informal wedding celebration instead of a bday party.
come hell & high water, i will not allow anyone to steal the limelight on MY 21st bday party!
*just kidding!*
ps: i need not worry at all coz ys wud be shy-er then i am.

they played some games after the cutting of cake & tho i did not know anyone, i laughed along as well. tho i have not seen xl's parents for ages, they were super nice to me. the mum chatted with me & insisted on sending me home. so paiseh... so kind of them!!!!!!!!!!

xl & me

i hope you like the present i gave you, tho its not much. the 1st present reminded me of the times when we were young, and always went to buy the iced syrup in a tube thingy, rem? the mama shop... hehe..
and the 2nd present consist of keys: a symbol of the coming of age.
i know that you will appreciate what is given to you, and may our friendship continue to grow, come what may.
you are indeed an impt friend of mine, and i spent the happiest childhood days with you, my special special friend. no matter how many better friends you may meet, or how far you shift away frm me, i understand that the pillow-waving-from-our-windows & after-school-play-zero-point activites will be etched in our minds always.
love ya!

happy me

2006-05-10T00:22:00.000+08:00

i feel so happy today.
simple gestures can make me feel like im on cloud nine :P

there is this customer named Valerie who i always call Elva, coz she is petite, and she looks like Elva Siao Ya Xuan, one of my favourite artist. i got so used to calling her Elva that i forgot her real name & whenever she comes for classes, i would "ELVA!" her and she wud blush & escape frm the limelight.

she came for class again today & michelle (tay) went, "eh there ur elva" (lol).
valerie then modestly swept the compliments away with her petite hand & said that I look more like elva (which is so not true. i'll die to look like elva!) her modesty is what makes me see her inner beauty & like her even more.
then she returned after awhile and put 2 sweeties on the table and said that those are for us :)
there has been customers who are very kind & they always give us kueh kuehs & stuff to eat, but this is different as she gave the sweetie to me specifically :)
and i know its not becoz i said she resembles elva.

the pinky tube sweet is the one i bought frm japan. i love it so much! i shall buy loads of stuff frm the japan supermarket the next time i visit coz there are really treasures in there to be discovered.
the pinky cola mint is frm 'elva'.
*touched*

like michelle (tay) said, this is a job where we can call our customers by their 1st names & i really feel good when we get to know each other and talk like friends. which other job allows me to do that? very few.
i will really miss the good times ive had there with my colleagues & also customers who have slowly become my friends.... but im going to leave very soon, joining a totally different working environment altogether.

then ys made me feel very loved by coming over to pass me some food & spend just a few minutes with me (i cudnt leave coz it was the busy busy rush hour). i mean, all the way there just to see me for awhile....
thank you baby... i really appreciate it.

i am again reminded of the goodness in this lousy modern world... there is hope for us human after all.

japanese men

2006-05-09T03:08:00.000+08:00

im hooked on bakafish, a japanese variety show. outrageous, it's so funny my ribs are cracking.

and i find the japanese very exotic, tho they are asians.

Narimiya Hiroki

he looks much better in person, and i spot a cute dimple on his right cheek during the ahem... Hard Gay show whereby razor ramon (masaki sumitani) tries to get into the front page of a magazine that only allows the very successful, famous, cream of the crop kinda actors to be on.
he gatecrashes during the photoshoot and the crew were visibly irritated with him (i admire his guts) but the cute narimiya speaks up...

watch it here!!!
warning: expect some hip pumping moves
1st part
2nd part

life's simple pleasures

2006-05-08T17:14:00.000+08:00

bleah!!
im finally home, away frm the direct hit of the sun's damaging rays.

im supposed to knock off at 130pm frm work today, but phoebe held a sales meeting till almost 330pm. i kinda like these kinda semi-formal meetings (not too often tho). i think phoebe is quite a good manager, tho ive heard negative remarks abt her (which i shall not repeat). she actually tries her best to get to know each and every one of her staff members, and she 'analyses' our personalities. she encouraged us to talk abt the factors that may have contributed to the bad sales last month (woops). it was a time to be frank with everyone & i felt closer to them that way. (i know i sound very sua ku but this is the 1st 'real meeting' ive attended)
when michelle mentioned that my resignation + daphne's supposed transfer to jurong point played a part in upsetting her, i was surprised. linda also mentioned that she was rather confused nowadays due to my resignation & wondering who wud be the new comers and if they wud be able to bond well.
phoebe told me that i play an important role too, tho i spent only a few hrs with them each day.
i realise that im rather uncomfortable with public praises directed at me, despite my yaya-papaya front.
i flinched when phoebe said that i actually make a good leader. she added that among us 4 (linda, mich, daph, me), im the most sensible & matured one (surprise surprise. ys always says im childish, but im more inclined to believe my manager. HAHA!)
when i made a face at those words, she gently chided me. but i dun mean to brush her words off, its just that i dont really know what kind of company/friend/team player i am. its easy to talk about others, but the most difficult person to judge is actually urself.

i dun mean that what phoebe said is true, tho i respect her point of view and accept the comments graciously (which is not very difficult to do so actually).

ive learnt to see things frm many different points of views (i believe i'll get to learn something new anywhere), and im thankful for all the memories (& lessons) that my amore team has given me and i will not forget them :)

*
i headed to bedok to change my rotting-away posb card to the new GO! card. i now have a card fetish; i went to open a uob acc just to get the mini card. i like leh. next up: dbs.
i was hoping to be served by hui hui who was working there coz i wanted to talk to her, but too bad, no luck.
after that, i went supermarketing.
i LOVE to shop at the supermarket :)
i bought oranges (for me & dad)), veggies (for daddy when he cooks maggi mee) & a fruit juice (for me). i was choosing the oranges till i yan hua hua coz there were so many bright orange balls in front of me. anyway, i find this simple act of gg shopping at supermarkets a real simple joy in life. i know that some ppl may think that its so uncool & auntie, but that's an opinion.
tho i love to shop with ys, shopping alone is fun too; i can pick up all the tibits i want without him reciting the amount of calories that come with my chips. i mean, what the hell is calorie? no such word in my dictionary.

eeks! time to change bedsheet..

ps: mission impossible III is good!! an unexpected delight.
pps: spent loads of moolah on formal wear :(

kite flying day

2006-05-06T23:59:00.000+08:00

i went kite-flying & boomerang-throwing today with ys at marina bay. it was a fun outing, albeit 'unsuccessful'.
its been ages since we last went to fly a kite (2 yrs?) and the previous kite had to be discarded coz i cant seem to find its head/tail.
anyway, we bought a new kite which i christened zubimaru.

"howl! zubimaru!!" -mich

we decided to be hobbits for today. the field was very muddy & we din want to dirty our footwear (and when i say muddy, i mean MUDdy). everywhere i walked/ran, i 'trampled' on the muddy watery mud. its the 1st time in years since i ran voluntarily (to get the kite up; ys even made a video of me running like mad) and to my surprise, i felt happy running (im a strict and active anti-jogging spokeswoman)
pardon the oxymoron.

it was so difficult to try and get the kite up. when, on the 100th attempt, the stubborn kite fell to ground, ys commented," must be coz there is no wind."
while i nod in agreement, we turned and saw several kites flying wildly in the sky, and i shook my fist in their owners' faces. we decided to move to another location coz the "feng shui" (esp the feng) is atrocious.
i had to succeed!!

so i tried...

and he tried...

"how?? zubimaru!!" -ys

but alas! we had no luck. the kite refused to fly. so we played with the boomerang, but we got tired after awhile as it din return to us as it should have and we have to pick it up after every throw.
im no energizer; my battery was flat very soon and we went to the seaside to take a breather.

tired, but happy.
i mean, the kite, on several occasions ALMOST took off, and there was this once i was so close to succeeding but ys had to reel it in and the kite fell *PLOP* back to earth.

*
went to east coast for sugar cane (2 glasses!!) & coconut + satay *yum yum*. east coast is so full of life. there were ppl surfing on the water, and i duno wads the name of that seasport (im gg find out) but they use these powerful kite-like thingy to pull them along.
its like wakeboarding while flying a kite. im dying to try that out too! and windsurfing!
and no, we din go for the wakeboarding today, nor yest :(
i love seasports!!! i remember ys and i jetskiing in thailand...
there were ppl building sandcastles; huge ones, mind you. its fun to look, but given my temperament.... i better stick to looking. that one needs loads of patience.

cant wait to do the many things that ive hvn got round to doing!

*
to ray: sorry i din reply ur sms! its sucha long story that i better type it here. i alredy have plans this sun (tml) so i cant meet up. i wanted to say 'how abt nx sunday" when i rem that its mothers' day and im going to treat my aunts to lunch, and i suppose you may want to have a nice meal with ur mum too (and the rest too), so we have rearrange! lets go watch a movie (the inside man?) the nx time we meet up.
cya :D

sorrow & happiness come in a package when you buy life

2006-05-05T00:54:00.000+08:00

just came back frm uncle gilbert's wake.
sigh.. i offered him a joss stick, tho i do not believe in the meaning of joss sticks, no offence.
that is the least i can do for someone who was so jovial, loving and really nice.
seeing his body in the coffin saddened me; his face was made up, but he looked really different. everyone was like wondering why he looked so "dark" and in my heart, i thought that that is becoz wads left of him is that empty shell. without the soul, without the spark that is not him, the body is but a shell that once contained the good man.
may his soul rest in peace, and that his young children will grow up well & that his family will take peace in the fact that they shared a life with such a good man.

many ppl (my seniors) at the wake recognized me and were pointing at me, saying that im so and so's daugther knowingly. some of them are friends of my granny's, frm the kampong days. i love to hear them talk abt those good old days, and i nv get tired of my granny talking abt wad happened when she chased after the boy (now a grown man) who 'fought' with her daughter (my aunt). i love.
gathered there are the family and buddies of the beloved funnyman uncle gilbert. looking at his kids & wife breaks my heart, for i know what they are going to have to go through very well indeed.
=...(

my grandma's ex neighbour's brother said to me "everyday when you wake up in the morning, be thankful, for that's one day you have gained."
simple but thought provoking words. it makes me wanna empty my bank account (not that i have much to clear) and go shopping, whatever.
life is short.
i shall do what i wanna do.
i shall buy and eat and work and play with gusto.

goodbye uncle gilbert... im thankful that i got to know you and sorry that it has been a short journey... peace be with you.

*
on a brighter, happier note, i shall post some (scary) pictures of the BBQ i had with my Amore peeps on sat, and the ktv session in honour of michelle tan's 22nd bday (courtesy of mich herself)(ok, i used to feel weird calling other michelles michelle when im a michelle myself, but i got used to it after working with the michelles)

i shall start with a very scary picture of myself. i got quite a shock when i saw it, so prepare urself and calm ur nerves later.
i mean, i have had other scary pictures before, but this is the tops, man.

*

*

*

*

*

ahem. i laughed till i looked like my eyelids are stuck shut with a super superglue. i duno why i laughed so heartily.
i only remember that the marshmallow i was toasting for myself turned a nice brownish color and the crazy girls ard me starting screaming in delight, as if ive perfected the art of toasting marshmallows and i... just laughed.
this is how i look when i laugh.
take it or leave it.
i wud leave it.

phoebe, my manager was drooling, and so i gave her the 1st bite of my perfect marshmallow.

crispy outside and sticky inside.

and i finished it up with someone giggling beside me.

the amore spa and fitness combined

again, but with a lil madness

the amore fitness staff plus daphne's baby girl
we were posing for another camera..

here we go again.
2nd row- frm right to left: michelle, candice (ex-staff)(ex schoolmate), daphne, charmine, linda, me
1st row: phoebe

*
michelle tan's 22nd bday @ partyworld ktv after work. i only have 2 photos coz there were other cameras but the owner of this one sent me thus many. shall get the rest frm.. the rest.

michelle tay aka funnybone: cute, always laughing out loud at jokes and ppl, very well-liked, a sweetie pie
michelle tan aka emily rose: super fair, hilarious, laughs very loudly oso, frank, a funny girl
michelle ong: thats me!
i love the michelles, me included! bahahaha!!

michelleS
mich reminds me of snow white... with her hairband and rosy cheeks :)

thats all for now.
working in the morning shift tml!! bleah.

i wud like to thank mr lys for being the sweetest thing and coming to fetch me and all.. i really appreciate it *muacks* let's get my bike fixed so we dun hafta use the car and waste petrol :)

everyone dies

2006-05-03T00:19:00.000+08:00

i just recieved a message frm my aunt.
bad news.
my family friend, uncle gilbert, passed away yest in his own house. im not too sure of what cause yet.

since young, i remember my uncle gilbert as someone who is always so helpful & cheery. forever smiling & being so fun-loving & nice.
now he is gone.
i duno him very well, but he has always been a good friend to my family. when my grandpa passed away last september, he was around to help out & ease what he can of the burden upon us. and now he is gone!
life is so fragile... & sad.
maybe when i get older & wiser, i will be enlightened abt life & death.
but now, looking at the world through my 20 going 21 years old inexperienced eyes, i cant help but feel sorrowful/spiteful at deaths.
maybe when i finally learn of the true meaning of life & death, i may feel better abt deaths.
for perhaps death is not really the end, but another beginning.
maybe death is not about leaving the others behind, but about leaving memories & stories for the future.

but i really cant feel that way now.. death is inevitable, and it took away ppl i love.
and the worst thing is, i can never battle with Death.
it will always win.

new job?

2006-05-02T12:40:00.000+08:00

i got the job.

they called me this afternoon & said that im 'suitable' for it, and i gotta go to PWC building again to sign the appointment letter & check if i can start training next mon (which i dun tink so). now, im not complaining that i have to head all the way there again coz i wanna visit the far east square again... there's this shop.. nvm.

anyway, i called Amore up and asked for my schedule tml coz i need to know what time i start work (5 plus) & i spoke to my manager, phoebe about it.
she is quite an easy to read person and by the tone of her voice, i can sense that she is not very happy that im going to leave. anyway, we agreed that i shdnt leave next week (she hates last minute thingy) & i have to go for the next training in june.

fine with me.

hope things turn out fine for me.
i miss my poly days; taking too many breaks in the designer pad, walking to other schools for foods, heading to the sports hall for a game or two, going to the bookshop just to buy my viva drink, laughing and working with my friends in the studio, heck! i even miss the tramatising pin up days with keith.
i really miss the photography classes too.
i miss my classmates and the fun we used to have together.
just like i miss the secondary school days.
but we all have to 'grow up' & in a flash, here i am, im going to work, bring home the bacon, plan for my future.
i may not know what my future is going to be like, but im going to enjoy the moment coz its going to pass me by.

ps: im so excited! ys and i went to east coast yest for a stroll (& a coconut) & then we saw this watersports area! i have always wanted to go wakeboarding (yrs and yrs ago), but its so expensive.. so i dint. they do not use speedboats there, instead, they devised a way, using wires and stuff to pull the person along the coast and hey presto! wakeboarding!
wad used to be a barren area now is seawater-full with ppl happily surfing on the water & i cant wait to try out! maybe i'll go this friday, and if its good (i see pros, but oso ppl who fall into the water as soon as their feet leave the land), i'll ask if my friends wanna go with me the next time! it looks so fun, but it sure doesnt look easy. i was itching to go and wakeboard right there and then, but we din have any proper gears/extra clothes.
i may try windsurfing too :)

*
How You Approach Life and How You Appear To Others:

You have a sensible and realistic outlook on life and your two feet are always planted firmly on the ground (though you may, on occasion, have your head in the clouds). Others often see you as a rock of strength, solid, reliable, dependable, and constant. You are, in fact, amazingly consistent for you possess great powers of endurance and do not like to make changes or adjustments in your regular routine. You do things deliberately and methodically and do not easily accommodate the unexpected. Though you have a gentle, even soft, appearance, you are enormously strong-willed and stubborn. You go at your own pace and refuse to be rushed or pushed into anything before you feel sure about it. You can be coaxed and persuaded by charm, beauty, love, or affection - but never forced. You won't fight either, but simply stubbornly resist any attempt to coerce you to do something you do not want to do.

The Inner You: Your Real Motivation:

You have powerful emotional attachments to the past, your family, your childhood, those places you associate with safety and security and your beginnings. Maintaining a connection with your roots and heritage and keeping family bonds strong are very important to you. Loyal, devoted, and sentimental, you tend to cling to whatever is dear to you, be it person, familiar place, or cherished possession.

bleah.

2006-05-01T14:40:00.000+08:00

:(

i was quite sad yest. i went to marina square with ys & we went shopping.
he bought 2 Nautica tops & i got myself a baby pink sports top plus a badminton racket (duno where my old rackets are).
we used vouchers again, and we spent a lil bit only :)

anyway, i went into this birkens shop & i just HAD to try them on to see my actual size. my current pair is size 38 Normal & i cud fit into 36/37 Narrow perfectly.
i put them side by side and the latter/s looks sooooooo much nicer.
jiajia & ys told me that my pair looks fine, and that they fit me well but coz i know my feet better than they do, i really felt that it was TOO big and im right!
i dun mean to whine or complain (im just saying as it is) but i paid for those and i just want what i intended to get.
o well, a lesson learnt. always try on wearables before making the purchase.

but ok lar, i felt better after awhike & we caught the movie The Sentinel.
at 1st, i thought it was rather boring, and i was confused (thought there were 2 men but "they" turned out to be the same person) but it turned out to be fine.

*
wad a waste of time. im home now, waiting for ys (his cousin's at his place so he "cant meet me now coz its not nice")
zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

grrrrrrrr!!!

2006-04-30T02:51:00.000+08:00

grrrrrr! so mad at myself.
i wanted to change my blogskin & rayner tried to help me with it a few days ago & today isk tried his hand at it.
but i still find sth wrong with it. with them (the skin, not my friends)
and NO im not a perfectionist.
tks for the effort, guys!

and i freaking cant find the CD that contains our pictures in KL frm the 5 different cameras!!!
im neat, but im messy!
im messed up!
muahahahahahahaha!!

ok im going bonkers.

looking forward to tml... yays mon is a public hol! rejoice!

virgin whisper

2006-04-28T23:57:00.000+08:00

its at least a size too big, and i shd have taken the Narrow instead of the Normal, but i still love it :)
its ultra comfty & lightweight & i love the cute print on it!!
but it really looks damn huge, even tho its a size 7, it looks like size 11. (which happens to be my bday)
jiajia's Blue Garden looks lovely, and sherman's pair is very nice too!

tks, jiajia, for ordering :) lucky ~~Mango~~ Mago the dog din gobble my birkens up.
im looking forward to more business with you.

ive been spending quite a lot lately again. but im glad many ppl complimented the "nice" pair of shoes i bought :)
and now i have birkens to my collection.

just how many pairs of footwear does a girl need??
i dont think u really wanna know.

tks baby, for picking me up & sending me back :)
as usual, the ppl who are supposed to inform me abt the outing today - "i tell u later abt it" - did not, and i just wanna say; "WHATEVER!" FOAD!

JOY TO THE WORLD!!! MY BIRKENS IS COME!!!!

2006-04-27T23:32:00.000+08:00

*burps*

so full!!! tks to steven, who came to pick me up after work & then brought me to 85 for hokkien mee, or lua & cai tao kueh :)
just becoz i lent him my camera for a day.

anyone else wanna borrow anything?? :P

YES!!! jiajia the hobbit has brought good news. our birkens have arrived!!! JIAJIA, MEET YOU ASAP!!!!
yayssssssssssssss!!

*
went to pw for 2nd interview today & again im told to wait for a call to confirm me. it reminds me of the SQ interviews.
Phoebe told me that i shd give the SQ interviews another go... some ppl have been encouraging me to do so and i duno.. i have my reservations.
today i was asked: wads ur aspirations?
i had/have alot of them, but it seems that im not pursueing any...i want to do so many things at a time, yet now i find myself stagnant.

all i want is to earn $$, lead a happy comfty life, surrounded my family, friends & ys, go on holidays, have time to play, time to work, have enough food on table, have enough sleep, can afford my fav brands of make up, help deprived ppl, keep myself healthy.
and it seems so inadequate.

im like so shallow.

i still cant find a right answer to that question and brooding abt it has no effect. hopefully, the answer will just pop out soon.
i dun want to lead a lifeless life.

brewerkz

2006-04-26T01:33:00.000+08:00

more pictures

2006-04-25T00:45:00.000+08:00

disclaimer: this post is supposed to be on MON, not TUES.

edited

cute dancing

my favourite swimmers

*
went for LO today. 30 mins of that, and i enjoyed it. then Sharon, the instructor switched to Cardio Latino (a new workout)to try out; since we're going have it very soon. i enjoyed it tremendously! i love that aerobics with salsa moves.. GROOVY! i loveeeee!
met ys after that (nights off)

im in the mood to post a few more pictures of sakura and stuff :)

the hole in the pillar in the temple

white sakura

gorgeous, arent they?

pink ones.
reminds me of cotton candy :)

up close; i din imagine the flowers to be the way they are close up. they just look so.. different.

i miss japan.

*
wish i can just stay in japan/somewhere else with my circle of ppl. i love singapore; i really do. its my home. but after living for 20 odd years, i feel that a change is good. drastic change.
go away to somewhere...
never wanna hear abt politics & witness brawls & shed an unhappy tear ever again.

zoo

2006-04-23T22:56:00.000+08:00

=)

i had a fun day at the zoo (half priced coz ster had the discount coupons. tks!!)! rayner brought his lil 3 yrs old niece, anna, along & she proved to be a very sweet and lovable child.
its so nice to meet up with my friends, and sam came along too.
the last time i went to zoo was with ys.. abt 3 yrs ago?

the zoo has become a nicer, better place, tho there are more things to be improved on. i love the cute otters & meerkats the best.they had lunch at kfc and anna was kinda reserved at 1st. i asked for one Hello Panda biscuit & she looked away & i thought that she was soooo shy & chose to ignore me. but then with her back to me, she handed me the biscuit, bending her arm over her shoulder to pass me the food "discreetly". hahah!

watch:
OTTERS VS BEAR
naughty lil otters :)
u can hear jy's hurhurhur too!

i love this photo :)
monkeys lazing on the net.

sweet uncle & sweet niece: hand in hand
whenever we sit down for an animal show, anna wud rest her tiny palm on rayner's thigh & i tink that is so awfully sweet :)
a simple gesture means so much.
but she accidentally dropped ray's cam & it wudnt work after that.
guah guah guah...

she is always rdy to smile for a picture.

we watched an egg hatch! a feeble lil chick kicked open its shell & made its way into this world & i tink its amazing... even tho its common, but i love watching these kinda stuff!
anna loves it too, i think.

anna warmed up to us soon after & she kept poking my arm/butt to get my attention. being curious, she kept pointing to one thing after another, asking me what's this & what's that.

pretty butterflies; one on my finger.
jiayin was so terrified of the insects/birds/anything, she quickly exited. ahem...

taking a rest after the elephant show. elephants were what anna wanted to see the moment she stepped in the zoo. she said she wanted to touch the elephants & she held my hand so tightly, rushing to them. (i noticed that the more excited she is, the harder she'll dig her nails/fingers into my knuckles/skin)
but when we reached, she seemed to think they're too big for her and changed her mind. she refused to get too close to the elephants.
kids!

cute anna & cute otters.
finally sth that's shorter than her!

after alot of walking under the sun, ster & sam went back & ray, yin & i went to town, supposedly to meet baoqi. but baoqi was tired after her exhibition thingy in expo, so the 3 of us went shopping for awhile; i bought pumps (duno if i can call tt pumps) den headed to have a drink & chat & stone.

spent quite abit!! but happy. happy is good.

~~ps: ive uploaded a video i took in zoo today, but its taking forever to process so i'll leave it till the nx time :D~~
there shd have been more photos, but jy accidentally erased all the pics in her cam & she was soooooo agitated. its ok girl, we all make mistakes.

tata. work tml. urgh :(
im so lazy...

im going to the zoo.. zoo.. zoo

2006-04-23T00:58:00.000+08:00

:)

an enjoyable day for me today :)
spent a bomb, but im happy; we're happy.
we watched our anime (quite a no of episodes coz we missed a few weeks' worth of them) & then headed to PS to shop. we had $40 vounchers (to be spent in a few shopping malls & we chose PS) & we looked ard for things to use those on. we cudnt find anything we want, so baby suggested i get a pair of Levis jeans.
my one and only pair frm Australia a few yrs ago... i altered it too short &... the rest is history.
anyway, we went in and tried jeans (me) and tops (he) & in the end i bought my Levis jeans. i love it!!! i had to top up, of coz, but 40 bucks off! yays!
bought nail polish, food (many times), guitar strings, etc etc.. (im itching to buy shorts frm flash & splash again.. but they're so dear!)
we had fun shopping ard and trying on clothes & just fooling ard. i was tempted many times. i tried this dress frm Esprit & ys wanted to see, but there was a queue and so i took a picture for him. he said that its nice! its sooooo not often that he encourages me to buy a dress coz he says i dont get to wear them often. urgh. i din buy it in the end. $$$$$$$

there.

sigh. and my hp bill.. i hvn paid! hehe.. and i also spent money on the pair of birkens tt jiajia ordered (for a grp of us) & she claims tt its a gift to me (when i alredy paid her for it... -.-") GIMME my birkens quick!

nvm.
i'll earn the money back. hope i get the job... im hopeful!

It's so unbelievable,
And I don't want to let it go,
Something so beautiful,
Flowing down like a waterfall.
I feel like you've always been,
Forever a part of me.
And it's so unbelievable to finally be in love,
Somewhere I'd never thought I'd be.

ps: im gg zoo tml!

videos?

2006-04-20T12:44:00.000+08:00

im so lazy to post more pictures frm japan.
videos can?
the videos are all quite short coz i wanted to save space for pictures :P

one of the fastest:
BULLET TRAIN

blow wind blow!
MOUNT FUJI

water carnival in disneysea
DISNEYSEA

here's a bonus video.
wicked.
check THIS out.

ps: i love the green tea mochi frm japan.

crisis

2006-04-19T19:50:00.000+08:00

i recieved a call frm the company i want/ed to work in and i have to go for an interview on friday 2pm.
i asked my amore girls for directions to the address (office) given to me & my manager asked why. i told her i had to go for an interview & she looked at me all weird & double checked that it was true.
she said that she wud be very sad to have me gone coz she'd nid to find another replacement.
i reassured her that i wudnt be leaving so soon, and that the company might not even want me. (tho i hope they will!)

and she kept harping on that fact that i was leaving soon, teasing me, saying that she wudnt give me any discounts for activewear after i leave. hehe..
(i bought two nike activewear tops today.. better dun let ys know..)

its not that i want to leave them, but i have to be practical & the pay over the other side is definately better. im mostly happy working in Amore, but i cant possibly work there forever with the measly pay. i wud like to work part time there forever (few worries, few hrs of work, many happy, many eat, many laughs, free lessons, near my hse), if i cud, but i need to really start earning my dough now & Amore is not the ideal place for me to do that.

that aside, i think im going through a "Crisis" now that only i know and fully understand.i hope i can untangle the knot in me & come to understand whats daunting me...
my bad.

*
i have girlfriends who claim that "nan bu huai, nu bu ai" (::bad guys appeal to girls). going by that theory, they announce that they simply cannot accept "good" decent guys coz they are not "suitable", "boring" & what have they.
but these are the very ppl who get hurt.
these are the ppl who are insecure.
they cry, and their hearts are weary.

i find the excuse very silly. to give myself credit (ahem), i have listened to many relationship problems & many of them chose the paths they are now in.
they cannot blame anyone else but themselves!
fights and quarrels are inevitable between couples, & only with mutual understanding & respect can they sail through any storm.
im not an expert myself, and i dun claim to be a good gf. but i understand my relationship completely, and i know my bf inside out. and i + him = we intend to make it work.
(or maybe its just that im blessed to have this amazing guy who walked into my life & stays put)
some say love is the bringer of agony.
i say, they are tarnishing the name of love.
love is good and absolutely nutritrious.

i love love.

and my bf is a good decent man, and i dun find him the least bit boring :)
im sorry...

and love doesnt 'happen' only between a woman and a man.

i love :)

wang shi zhi neng hui wei

2006-04-18T23:01:00.000+08:00

i forgot to mention this:

ys was driving us along the highway when the YES 9.33 DJ said something. i shall try and translate her words. she said that the "sui ye" (erm.. golden yrs?) passes very fast. what we enjoyed in the past may no longer be avaible right now.
friends who used to be very close to in the past may pass each other on the streets & some choose to "cia qian er guo" (rub shoulders when walking pass each other? ::pretend not to notice)
it's very sad, but this is life. these are real people and their choices & what we can do is to accept things.... and hold on to the happy memories...

too true.
so real.

*
gotta work full shift today and tml coz linda's 10 yr old bro is found to have tumor! omg bless her family and may the tumor disappear!

wad a day... fire and water

2006-04-17T23:35:00.000+08:00

whao! wad a day i had!

i went for work this morning, feeling rather "sian-ed". it seemed like it was going to be a uneventful day like the many days before.
at ard 11am, the fire alarm went off but none of us really cared. then a woman frm the escalator looked at me and said "there's a fire" & i din noe to laugh or smile.
notice that none of my options was to take her seriously.

nx, i saw ppl rushing down stairs & escalators & that really wiped the grin off my face. my manager and i looked at each other & went out to have a look.
behold! smoke was thick & the smell of panic in the air.
i cud c fire frm the sakae sushi restaurant (a floor above us) and we quickly went back to "save" our amore members. luckily the class finished and most of them were getting rdy to leave.
i saw a lady fumbling with her undies and pants and i spared her the shame by not looking her way..

after we checked the entire studio for ppl, we pulled the shutter and headed out. on our way, we saw lil pre schoolers hand in hand, two by twos and there were so many kids and few teachers so we helped them. cute lil things they are.

firemen came and did their job while the rest of us waited outside the building. to give starbucks credit, they served everyone free mini mocha jelly. nice!!!

after the crazy scene, we went back to work. BOO.
i went to kaima's place for lunch after that & it rained the moment i stepped out of the building. i was determined to get to her place by myself and not trouble her when the rain become heavier and i had to stop to call her. she kindly brought the umbrella for me and will you believe it, the rain stopped.
then when i left her place 1 hr later, the rain started to pour again.
(-------__-------"")

fire and water all in a day.
i definately prefer the water.

*
i had a reallllllly good weekend with baby. [tho all the time spent with him are good (aside frm the fighting).]
we bought roller blades.
i bought a pair of fluffy shorts (hehe...)
we watched Nanny Mcphee on the telly.
we went to Beerwerkz or wadever the name of that pub is at clarke quay with bk, vish, ruilin & terrence. they watched soccer & Arsenal won :)
we had food (t-bone steak) and drinks (hoegarden) & the pics are with vishy.
we celebrated ruilin's bday.
and we went blading at east coast just now. im rather new at it and i only noe how to move forward (with difficulty) & i fell a few times on my butt and it was so fun (blading, not the falling down), despite our aching feets :)
had a coconut after that.
delectable.

thank God he cud book out today.

i wanted to post more pictures of japan but im tired now & i shall leave it till... tml?
meanwhile, ive uploaded a video.
this was taken at the sea show & i was taking many videos of my absolute fav dolphins, and this birdie flew and perched itself in front of me & chirped. i tot it wanted attention so i took a video of it, but the big fish swims by and then i follow it and the birdie got angry and....

watch it here.

7 days Central Japan Discovery

2006-04-16T23:06:00.000+08:00

sorry for the delay.

im back for a few days alredy and i feel like i have never left. i definately wanna go back to japan again with my family/friends/bf.
it has been an "enlightening" trip, for japan is so different frm the places ive been to. it is like going exploring, coz the japanese not only speak a different language, but the cultural is oso so different frm the western countries.

thank you for making this (good, fun) trip possible...

i snapped many many pictures, and i cant possibly upload everything, so i gotta cut down the amount. anyway, i did not take alot of the kinda pictures i took in KL with my frenz coz its different gg with my aunt VS friends OR bf.
but still... i really loved the trip :)

i left for japan on friday evening. the flight was abt 7 hrs. i did not sleep at all.

'land of the rising sun' is not named in vain, for i had the 1st class seat to viewing the sunrise frm the lovely horizens.. with the frost on the window.

we arrived at the Narita airport in the morning, so we headed to the places of interest soon after we landed (with lugguages in bus). i had a bad start, for i hated the tour guide (at 1st) and he seemed very inefficient to me.

1st stop: Yokohama Hakkeijima Sea Paradise: japan's largest collection of marine life in one aqua museum.

after the sea show.

i din post any marine fish pics tho i love them all coz there are too many pics alredy :) and there are videos too, which i will post after i have them loaded :)

after the show, we headed to Tokyo city & visited the Asakusa Kannon Temple. we shopped at Nakamise Shopping street. i loveeeeeeeeeeee that place so much!

we flew to Kansai, Osaka frm Haneda airport later that night.

the Osaka Castle

Kobe chinatown

"street" vendor

happy selling

we were lucky to be able to catch the sakura, for the flowers bloom and last for only a week. the ones in toyko were abt to wilt while the ones in osaka were in full bloom!

the things in japan are so expensive, the affordable gifts for frenz and family back home are tibits!!

we love soft shell crab!

the machine for the kueh kueh that i love so much...

but i never got to buy them again after that day coz we din c it anywhere else... its cheap (as compared to others) & really delicious. the red bean paste inside, and the warm kueh kueh outside *drools*
lucky we did buy some!

nx, we headed to "Mosaic" town. one of my fav shopping place there.
its an open air mall and the sea is just bside it! the things they sell are really kawaii!

familiar?

cutey bricks :)

japanese children posing and i took this quickly :P

in the evening, we went to Shinsaibashi, a shopping and food paradise for food and shopping. but we were ONLY given 2 hrs to eat and shop and the place was gargantuan!

i wanna go back there again!! we din even cover 1/4 of it! not even 1/8! not 1/10!

my aunt said that okonomiyaki is very famous is osaka and we decided to 'must' try it.

but 1st, we tried the optopus ballsy and boy! its just great to eat steaming ballsy in the cold.

something happened to us after that.
we were looking high and low for the okonomiyaki, and i even bravely asked ard (in half baked japanese) for the place to find it.
the shopping area was really really huge and so as not to get lost, we oni wandered straight ahead without making turns so we knew where we were. but when no okonomiyaki was in sight, we decided to take a turn and venture out and expose oursleves to the cold cold elements.
come what may!
we went to yet another jap restaurant to ask if they sell the food we wanted and the waiter answered in the negative. however, unlike the others before him, he got another waiter to bring us there, saying that he knew the way/person/restaurant? whichever.
he kindly led us all the way (turns and turns.. omg) to this place and told me that the resturant is on the ikkai; 2nd floor.
we thanked him profusely and went to the 2nd floor. there, a posh jap restuarant. a young man greeted us & again i asked for okonomuyaki and he said, yes we have it, and invited us in.
we ordered just the okonomiya and after he sent the order in, he brought peas for us to munch on, saying that its free & chatted with us in abit of chinese. it was hilarious.

i swear, he looked 100 times better in person. my aunt took a pic with him too.

den he brought us iced tea (FOC too) and we had to wait 20 mins for the food (and there wasnt time left to get back to mit the tour ppl) i sat facing the wall and my aunt said alot of waitress taking turns to peep at us (we duno why) and den wen the food came, this guy (found out he's a manager) gave us free noodles. we were full alredy and din even fin the okonomiyaki and had to rush back to meet our tour ppl so we ate as much as we cud n said a rushed sry, paid and left.
he gave us a namecard and 20% card before we left.

i felt very bad and its not often a manager will offer us free food & that we can meet such helpful ppl. my aunt told me to call/write and thank the guy (forgot his name)

o well.
maybe i will..

there was no more activity at night, so we went opposite our hotel and tried our hand at pachinko; something like jackpot, but gambling is not legal in japan.

TOKYO -TOYOHASHI

todaiji temple - where they hold one of the largest bronze buddha structure in jap.
i tink its the biggest building made of wood.

ur considered blessed if u can crawl through the tiny hole in one of the pillars inside.. i went through it! teehehe...

pretty sakura

ramen frm the streets. its not cheap, but i guess it's considered ok-ay by the locals. delicious :)

after that, we went to the deer park (many "landmines") in the evening, we went for the kimono show.

now this is my favorite. lovely model, lovely kinomo.

we had sleepwear provided every night in the 5 different hotels we stayed in. nice!

LAKE KAWAGUCHI

we went for the bullet train ride (Shinkansen)
abt 1500 yen for a stop only. ex!

lunch before the ascent to mt Fuji.

i love japanese food :)

we almost cudnt make it there due to bad weather conditions. but we made it to the 4th level.. pity we cudnt make it to the 5th.. but nvm.
nx time!!

hiding frm the crazy wind. frost bite!! the wind was so strong it had the umbrella my aunt bought turned inside out.. hehe.. [we din bring the umbrella back to sg (we loved it) coz we had too many things to carry!]

dinner at night

the guide i hated at 1st turned out to be quite fun loving after all.

i went to the hot spring after that. the hot spring is seperated for the male and female. u had to strip naked, bathe urself by the spring and then only when ur clean can u step into the hot spring and soak urself silly.
not more then 15 mins tho.. my heart was beating rather quickly after my soak and i felt a lil giddy at 1st coz its my 1st time. the other ppl were shy and waited till it was late (nobody ard) and den they went for it. there was no one ard when i went in.. so good for me :D
it was a very good experience :)

it was the best dinner. everyone sat together in their futara and had their dinner. we sang songs, took photos, and laughed alot :)

my fav hotel. we slept in real futons and i LOVE the real jap styled rooms, furnished with tatami mats and sliding doors and to complete it, the view right outside the window was none other than mt fuji itself.

the LAST DAY

we went to this crystal place where they sold us diamond like crystals (my aunt and i bought a necklace each) i was deciding and then she said that i really shd buy it and so i did...! but its really ex for me.. 12000 yen!
this is the huge crystal that everyone shd touch coz the powers will rub off on u. haha..

disneysea!!

water carnival

*i tink i shall stop here.. im so tired!!!

more tml!

back frm Japan

2006-04-14T11:37:00.000+08:00

im back.

from....

ive loads of pictures to edit, post, and ive loads to type. but not now. gotta wait a few days.

the amount of tibits/food i bought... and this is only my share. my aunt's share... no comments.

i lurveeeeeeeeeeeee Japan very much.

bye bye all.

2006-04-07T22:30:00.000+08:00

BYE ALL, im at the airport now using the free internet thingy :)
i miss my baby, my friends, my bed, my toilet, and the bedok air :(

may i come back in one piece...

i gtg soon.. have to board the flight soon =)

to japan i go... tomoro

2006-04-06T23:21:00.000+08:00

:)

im leaving on a nippon plane... duno when i'll be back again. so kiss me, and smile for me.. lah lah lah..

ahem.
sorry.

im happy to go japan, but also kinda sad, even tho its only for a week. but at least i have some lil memories to sustain me for awhile.
met up with jason and isk for prata supper the other night, and today, rayner & jiayin met me in the airport for lunch at Fish & Co :)
baoqi cudnt make it due to her job orientation (congrats!) and lester din bother to reply us.(well, congrats too.)

im so sry i was late, guys... due to my stupidity (shhhh dun tell anyone i din realise earlier that i have to go tanah merah to change a train, and that waiting in bedok for a train to take me straight to changi airport is in vain)
and tks rayner, for the fei cui chicken :D~

i'll start with silly pictures.

he loves his lemons...

...and she, her tiramisu...

....me, i love everything thats edible; tastefully done plz.

check out my expression :D

engaged in animated talk..

tks for making the effort to meet up :)
i love the airport!

we shall, we will have many many more meet ups.

i rushed to work at 2+, and reached just in the nick of time to punch in (woe betide me shd i be late) and then im gently informed that my shift started at 3.30pm, not 3pm, thank you very much.

*
baby had night out today, as did yest, tho he chose to stay in yest coz i had to work till 930pm & he had to book in at 1030pm. i finished work at 7.30pm today so he came to find me and we had some snack, talked, and i accompanied him to tanah merah to wait for the jail bus (due at 930pm)

really really love ur company darling, even if its for a lil while.
LOVE YOU!!!!
VERY VERY MUCH!!!!

ive packed my lugguage but it seems like there is nth much to pack wor. its so empty! hehe.. hopefully, i'll lug LOADS of new stuff back :)
but everything is so expensive there... *sobs*
and sorry jiahui, i cant attend ur bday chalet coz i'll be gone with the wind. but i wish u a HAPPY 21ST bday :)
be happy always!

i will miss some ppl while im gone. (i will not miss working)
byebye.
i will take many pictures.
i just bought new batteries.
with a camera in one hand, i will conquer japan in 6 days.

bye... :) :(

one day to japan.

find the similarity

2006-04-05T23:53:00.000+08:00

i hvn been blogging coz there isnt much to blog abt. ive run outta batts for my digicam so i cudnt take any and post pics either.
desperate times call for desperate measures.

ive decided to post my pictures of the past; with different poses of coz. but somehow, there seems to be something in common in these different pics and i cant quite put my finger to it.
can you?

thats me at my 'truest' form :)

love life, not lies

2006-04-03T22:54:00.000+08:00

~~LIFE~~ LOVE IS FRAGILE
HANDLE WITH CARE

*
::diploma show::

the faces in my poly life

sadly, not everyone took the picture with me.
but cherish wad we have.
we dunno when things may change.

4 days to japan :)

5 more days to japan

2006-04-03T08:25:00.000+08:00

5 more days to japan!!!

*
what i did over the weekend:

went to dip show for awhile, had a lovely time with my darl, love the feeling of being with the entire batch of iadians (that i took for granted back in sch), went to east coast to hang out with vish, bk and ys, met up with my sec sch girlfriends, met up with gene and frain for awhile, saw dhawal off to brunei, played with rizila's cute lil baby girl, (not in order) etc etc...

i hate being lied to.

love my baby

to hell with dip show

2006-03-30T22:25:00.000+08:00

it sucks.
my work sucks.
my only works that i can let ppl see are with my photography lecturer, and therefore i have nth substantial to put up at my stupid allocated place in the national library.
i let myself down.
so i blame no one else.

perry, dun call me... im sry.

but the feeling sucks.

*
i went to an aerobics class today, thinking that its a class for beginners, no sweat. but the movements and tempo were rather daunting and i had a lil trouble following yang mei, the gorgeous china instructor (i REALLY love her, she's the bomb!) and i felt so lembek. i skipped the last 10 mins and then i bathed. and found out that the class i attended was HI-LO, not LO! it was an advanced class i went to -.-"

im going for pilates class tml :)
ive not done pilates before but i sure wanna try :)

*
zzzz tinking abt dip show makes me sad, and being sad reminds me of being rejected by SIA, and being rejected reminds me that im not quite valuble :(

lalalal.. blessed as i am, i still can see the silver linings behind the dark clouds & im thanking my lucky stars.

i love my family (bf included) and friends. and congrats to kahhway for passing her driving on 1st attempt! way to go, gurl!! ^_^

of shark fins and thieves

2006-03-30T00:17:00.000+08:00

i hope the 4 thieving lil thugs who nicked my father's wallet rot in hell.

i wonder wad my reaction wud be should someone rob me (not that im a good target). i sure hope i beat the hell outta that person/s.
decided! im gg for class tml b4 i start my shift.its high time to tone up those muscles that are abt to atrohpy *gulps*

*
met jiahui, mindy & kah hway today :) been some time since we've met up. even tho we have our differences, i still enjoy their company. its really smashing to keep in touch with old friends, go out, chit chat, eat, drink. etc... despite our rather busy schedules. lucky i am able to meet them coz i finish work at 6 today. phew!
we ate at maches (wanted to save money for japan, but heck! once in awhile) and i bravely refused to buy the mango top that i fell in love at 1st sight. honestly, if it wasnt for the japan trip, i wud have bought it :(
but i cant have my cake and eat it too. smell can alredy.

my frens at amore and i were talking abt turning vegetarians. some of them said that the pigs and cows really cry when they are abt to be butchered, and they claim that the animals do know that they are abt to be served on the hotplate when they queue up to be slaughtered. i duno if that is true, but they do feel the pain when the knives hit their flesh and i somehow tink its disgusting that im eating them, no matter how delicious they taste.
for a start,im against eating sharks fin (i refuse to take that stuff); ppl simply slice off the fins off those magnificent monsters alive and kick them back to the sea, where they die a slow painful death. they need to swim to get oxygen, and without fins, they cannot breathe, and to add insult to injury, smaller fishes feed on the fresh wound.
some ppl may say,"so hypocritical, den how abt chickens, ducks, cows??"
i duno, maybe coz i believed that those poultry die a swift, painless death, but some ppl beg to differ and i tink maybe i really shd give up eating meat altogether.
skeptical?
i noe, its hard to give up completely but i noe i can do things once i set my mind to it, and maybe i shall go abt it slowly, progressively.
i will not give up eating seafood tho. heh..
anyway, when i get hungry, i can always reach for my fav calbee very pari pari potato chips.

i wish ppl wud stop judging the personalities of ppl by how trendy they are, how fat/thin they are, how pretty/ugly they are, what certificates they have, their salary and so on. its NOT an accurate judgement. im not a saint, but i accept ppl the way they are just as they shd accept the way i am. (at least i think i do)
i feel sry for the world.
the ppl in it are ruining it.
guess im one of them.

shywei's 21st bday

2006-03-28T22:22:00.000+08:00

happy 21st bday shywei! :)

i hope she likes the victorian styled key necklace (shared with jy, baoqi & hongyi) i chose for her coz i like it myself (saded). my current fav japanese accessory shop!!
both lester (and parents) and shywei worked hard (BBQ) to feed the hungry/greedy crowd =)

dont have many pictures coz batts died on me :(

we played one lousy round of cludo

huff...

and puff...

and look who's not singing the bday song....

-end of gallery-

tks rayner, for that very cute tee (a perfect fit) and that voodoo cutie thingy frm thailand! much appreciated!! :)

*
i duno issit my nerves or wad, but i had a nightmare abt a trip to this super wulu country (i dun even noe the name).
my aunt and i travelled to this country and when we checked in at the hotel, the ppl showed us to our 'room"; a storeroom-like space with mattresses on the floor, with blankets as the 'walls'. we tried to argue that we deserved a better room but as we were in a foreign land, we were afraid that they might just shoot us and bury us under the mattress! omg i duno how to describe it but its scary! we had to hang on to the exterior of the plane during the flight coz there wasnt enough seats inside the plane... i tink! =S

anyway, my flight (REAL flight) to japan has been confirmed and i will be leaving on the 7th april. it'll be a one week hol. we wanted to extend the stay, but due to some airline probs, we cant!! BOOOOOOO!!!!! ARGHHHHHHHH!!!
really quite disappointed, but im grateful that i can even go in the 1st place (tho it doesnt quite relieve the sting of disappointment)
but still, im gg!! =D

im pretty worried abt the language barrier! this is the 1st time im gg to a foreign country where i cannot speak their language and i'll only be gg with me aunt! (im not sure if my kaima is gg...)
im trying to brush up, BUT i probably will not catch wad they are saying *sobs*
but hey hey, i hope we can catch the cheery blossom!! pretty!

forgot wad i wanna blog abt... shucks.

i haven been spending much time with my baby; he can only book out one day, or 1 and de half days coz he is doing duties now. things will improve when he officially becomes the instructor (poor thing, but he prefers jogging to doing duties, and i HATE jogging) and he can book out on fri, sat and sun as usual. but for now... uh uh, i dun see him much. we dun talk much on the phone either, for his duties hrs are all over the place, while im working :(
well well, all for a better, brighter future.

wad else?
hmm, oh my dip show.
apparently everyone is rushing, worrying, fretting, crying, stressing, printing, but me? i aint doing anything... coz im not gg into the design field.
"if u wanna be a designer, be a GOOD designer. otherwise, dont waste ur time!"
- someone once told me

so why waste my time and effort and the ink to print the posters?
as if someone is gg to recognize my "talents" and pick me for the job.
so yes, not that i dun give a damn abt this dip show. i wish i cud participate more actively coz its once in a lifetime! but sadly, im rather useless.. at these kinda stuff.

wish i were a 4 yr old child all over again...

for better or worse

2006-03-27T12:00:00.000+08:00

hatred is the scariest emotion. it can change one person inside out, frm a good to a wicked & frm a wicked to a 'black rider'.
the soul is contaminated, and there is no point of return.
the usual forms of anger is still no match for deep hatred; one that grows even into the bone & in the end, the hater ends up hurting others and him/herself (the most)

hating ppl only makes oneself suffer; the constant brewing emotion is a strain on the heart (which is good by nature, i believe)

im going to work forever till i have enough to retire, and i will have to prepare to take things i dont like frm ppl. i wonder if i can survive. i wudnt say i wud 100% prefer studying (those days were sweet and fun, but i remember the frustrations and worrying), but it still beats having the responsiblilty of having to put bread on the table suddenly pressing onto me. not that im the sole breadwinner, but still...

my aunt leng is my role model.
being independant, believing in her own capability, striving hard and working smart, saving loads for a better life, she has achieved them all and more.
"why hope, and then disappoint urself? i rather use my own money to support myself", she said of children who are supposed to provide for the parents. she is single, and doing well.
my role model. not that that i nessessary have to be single, but i want to do well too.

i will be eternally grateful for all that you have done for me..

life is sometimes complicated, but i look at it in a simple way. there will always be ppl who i dislike, ppl who dislike me, etc etc..
i try to crawl into my own world when i met these ppl, and ignore them all, hiding in my shell till they are gone. like a hermit crab.
pests are pests, there world is full of them.
i dont wanna cross over and join the dark force (my toes are abt to cross the line), for Gandulf's side always wins.
i want to be a better person. (but not a pushover, a wimp or a submissive scaredy cat who has no guts to stand up for herself.)

maybe i can start now?

i miss my baby :(

saving for my rainy days

2006-03-24T22:28:00.000+08:00

its been rather trying, me wanting to save money for the japan trip.
even tho i was soooooo tempted to purchase the bra frm nx door (from amore), i hesitated, and i din...
even tho i wanted to buy that nike pants for workout, i din...
even tho i want a new wallet, i din!

coz those are wants, not needs.
im very lucky to be able to buy so many things alredy..

but i'll be getting a roller blade, coz i wanna blade with baby!! its time for me to work, earn, save for the rest of my life. sounds like a long time, but who noes when i'll die.
i am materialistic to a certain extent, which is why i have the "my wants" on the right hand side. but being not-rich doesnt mean i cannot dream, cannot wish, cannot hope! hope is free! and i will try to attain wad i want by working hard for it.

i just want a simple, happy life.....

ps: forgot wad i wanna blog abt alredy... x_X
pps: omg im so excited abt the new program "cardio latino" that is gg to be introduced to my outlet sometime in april/may!! im so gg to join the classes!!! (i wanted to go for Pilates this morning, but..... muscles ache, wake up late)

Your Birthdate: July 11

Spiritual and thoughtful, you tend to take a step back from the world. You're very sensitive to what's going on around you, yet you remain calm.Although you are brilliant, it may take you a while to find your niche.Your creativity is supreme, but it sometimes makes it hard for you to get things done.
Your strength: Your inner peace
Your weakness: You get stuck in the clouds
Your power color: Emerald
Your power symbol: Leaf
Your power month: November

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

work work

2006-03-23T23:04:00.000+08:00

ahem, i shall update b4 jy comes after my blood. i mean, i do update religiously, and then she demands more updates frm me.
wads a girl to do?

anyway, ys had his night out today, & a pity i had to work. he had to reach tanah merah by 1030 so he came to find me at 945 and after work, we went to tanah merah together =(((

ive been meaning to blog abt sth that ive been thinkin abt, but coz i was busy chatting on msn, i dint. (haha!!)
my colleugues at Amore are nice, funny ppl. but they duno me well at all. i mean, ive work for less den a mth there (put together the days ive been working now + the past).
there was this friend who said that im acting sporty by wearing a slagenzer watch (a tennis branded watch) and she din noe that its associated with tennis at 1st till i told her. then she said that im girly, etc etc..
i din take it as an offence la, but i must say that i din not act sporty lor... i mean, issit a cardinal sin to wear sports watch? hehe.. & girly? i smiled when i rem ster saying tt im the most unlady-like lady he noes :P
ppl have so many opinions abt me; i wud like to think thats coz im so versatile, but sadly, tts coz they sometimes duno me well. like i was mistaken for being a lesbian, eurasian, speak-english-only-person, miss popular, bitch, etc etc when ppl 1st got to me noe me.

i noe i will never get a 2nd chance to make a 1st impression, but sometimes all ppl need are 2nd chances.

sometimes, all it takes is small, minute, silly, trival things to make me put on my thinking cap.
friends are friends coz they are willingly to tolerate each other despite their flaws. even tho there are times i wanna strangle someone with my bare hands, i am oso reminded of the good in them, and i stop. there will always be flaws in ppl, but its how much one values the friendship that makes the overlooking task easier and bearable.
i am not flawless too...
take me or leave me.

but its so obvious when someone does not cherish me and i really noe who stands where as time goes by...

*ding*
time for my supper (homemade hotdog with xtra cheese and bacon bits)

new secret place ;)

2006-03-21T23:23:00.000+08:00

finally met up with my dearest old friend, miss xiuliang aka joyce! she was late (again); old habits die hard.
the last time we saw each other was more than 1 year ago!! but she remains the one friend closest to my heart coz we grew up together :)
and she is still so pretty!

im so glad to know that she is doing well now, and she even drives now. not that i measure success by the ability to drive or not, but inevitably, being able to drive is indeed a bonus. and the most vivid memory i have of her is playing zero point & playing on the swings, and suddenly now she can drive.

she brought me to this 'secret' place in town (which i will introduce to my BB - boardgame buddies) & its quite an isolated location which most ppl wud not give a second glance as they walk pass. but its quite a cosy corner, connected to the retail shop beside it, and when in the restaurant/cafe, one can soak up the sun while enjoying the view through the big clear windows.
we ordered fries & baked fish to share, and along with the set meal comes a choice of salad or soup of the day (carrot & tomato!? EEKS), and drinks -lime burst or rosey posey (funny name!!).
we took the salad (which turned out disappointing.. thouand island sauce plz, not vinegar!), and we wanted rosey posey but the aunt insisted that the lime burst is 'great'... which is far frm the truth.

aunt: one set only ah?
me: yes, we are sharing..
aunt: den drink leh? drink oni one how to share??
me: -.-" SHARE LA.
aunt: *backs off*

hahaa.. she wanted me to buy another drink lo! why cannot share drink leh? absurb!

we ended up drinking the plain water she gave us instead.lime burst is NOT nice.
but the baked fish is fab! at 1st i tot it tasted bland, but eat the fish with the special topping & omg, its absolutely delicious!!
YUM YUM!!

i wud go there again with friends to chill out.. its perfect for chatting and laughing :)
xiu liang oso introduced this crystal jade "fei cui" chicken wing to me. yummy wor!! we ate alot la, went to taka basement to buy kueh tutu (my fav) and den to mos burger to eat the chicken wing after our lunch :)
we reminisced, well, mostly I reminisced, and she has the worst memory. sadly, she cant remember many of the things that i mentioned that happened when we were young! *shakes head*

went to work after that.
i need to recap all that ive done in Amore! it seems like ive forgotten plenty of things :(
and i was discussing with my colleagues abt the low pay and we all wanted to quit. HAHA! (shhhhh)
kidding lar, i cant quit so soon. its irresponsible! i shall work there for as long as i can, den find a better job with a good pay for myself.

money money money... i dont love it. but i like it.. and i need it!!
come to me!!!
*chants*

mission accomplished!

2006-03-20T22:05:00.000+08:00

i think i shdnt leave things done halfway, yes?
so i went on to finish up painting my room :)

there is still a lil touch up to do, but 95% is finished :)
im gg to mit xiuliang tml! its been ages since we last met up! and i gtg work after that...
am so tired... i kinda hate a certain irritating person on msn, am itching to BLOCK that twit!

Dear God,
please make all my enemies disappear into hell.
tks!!
Amen.

hard work pays off :)

2006-03-20T16:49:00.000+08:00

im alive!!!!

after the gruelling hrs of painting my room, i... haven finished painting!!! muahahahha!
but!!!! ive painted 3 walls on my own. my uncle offered his help, but he has to work and he'll need rest when he gets home. and ys said he'll help too, but i think its different if i paint it myself.
and its no easy feat!!!!!!!
im left weakened, my legs rubbery, my body/face scarred & dotted with the paint. its really really tough work; shifting the heavy cupboard & bookshelf aside, moving the bed and trying not to spill anything. my arm ached frm painting on the vertical walls, and ive got blisters & scratches (frm duno wad)!

there, a mark of my herosim. li hai ba?
*smirks*
somemore on my right hand (im right handed!).. i LOVE my limbs and my body, even tho they are not perfect :)

nippon paint rocks my socks!! it doesnt stink, and the colors turned out lovely :)
at 1st, i was worried that Raspberry might be too sweet for me, but it's fine. i love Country Blossum! admittedly, my workmanship isnt very professional, but i tink its good enough lar ;)
i was on the verge of giving up when i was painting the 1st wall. i had my blisters just painting the 1st wall, and i was so tired i took a 1 & de half hrs break. i was perspiring like mad! i just felt like drinking the creamy, delicious looking Raspberry and not paint anymore.
painting my room = running 2.4km

but i decided to continue to paint one more wall, and after the 2nd wall was done, i pushed myself to paint the 3rd. i purposely left the wall that requires most tedious shifting work (computer table, study table, wires) untouched. looking at it gives me a big headache!!!
and there's the stupid aircon that broke down econs ago thats still there, hindering my painting job *tsk tsk*
(i may get ys's help... heheh)
its quite fun la (on hindsight only), albeit tiring. my raspberry paint dripped on my paler country blossum and i had to cover them up, and there is a big mistake on the wall, so i simply turned it into my surname "wang". hahaha... i'll paint over it when i finish up my last wall... or maybe i may leave it alone.

phew.. i love the result. it is SO different when i walk into my room. i loveeeeeeeee! its sucha blessing to have my own room, and i can personalize it slowly. i hope the government NEVER touches my block, and i get to live here forever :)
it was hard work painting, but it paid off!

*pats myself on the back*

gg back to amore to work part time frm tml onwards, but the hrs are rather flexible for me coz im just a part timer :)
need the money to go Nihon.

mummy's blessings

2006-03-20T00:05:00.000+08:00

generally speaking, the chinese are a supertitious lot. they believe in many things that may seem absurb to others. when it comes to 4d/toto/big sweep, their desire to win big bucks sometimes blind their logic & they do anything to try and get the fengshui right so as to minimize the hurdles to the big-bucks-way.

im not being unloyal abt my race. there are other races who believe in things that i scoff at too.
but im talking abt the chinese coz i happen to be a chinese and sth happened that tells me not everything in this world can really be accounted for by science, nor logic, not mathematical formulas (plus, my ineptitude at maths....).

at my aunt's hse on sat, we were considering to go to japan. my main concern was that it wudnt be cheap gg to japan. the food, lodging, shopping, ahhhh... only one word : exhorbitant
so my aunt jokingly said she hopes my mummy will bless her to strike the 4d coz her daughter (me) wanna go japan.
at my grandma's place (gathering as per normal), they check the 4d every sat. she din strike & i was sorry even tho it was kinda expected. i mean, its really hard to have the 4 numbers matched. the 1st time i bought 4d, 3 of my 4 numbers matched... and i was so sian diao coz oni one number stood in my way of getting a cheap thrill :(

at night, in my own room, i spotted a moth. the chinese believe that the deceased return in the form of moths to visit their beloveds. i cant say that i believe it totally, for it seems like a fairytale. but it is nice to believe it, like the fairytales that i once believed when i was not yet contaminated with the adultish world.
esp since the death of my grandfather, i am inclined to believe that somewhere, my mother & grandfather are missing us.

today my aunt sms-ed me, saying that she won the 2nd prize at 4d!! (she always bought for sat/sun)
i was both happy & amazed.
now, my aunt has extra cash for the trip!
issit my mummy who "blessed" the winning numbers, or issit just sheer luck?

i guess the truth is in the head of the believer ;0)

i wanna go japan!!!

2006-03-18T22:08:00.000+08:00

happy bday Alvin!!
sry i din attend the bday dinner....

if all goes well, i may be heading to japan in april!!! the initial plan was to fly to either HK (i wanna go!), or shanghai & suzhou (i wanna return and see!!). but i went to my aunt's hse today and this show (byran wong & xie shaoguang as hosts) were in hokkaido, and i announced that we shd go japan instead and my aunt took up the idea!!! *grins*

we may be gg to toyko & den hokkaido, but we're still undecided to go free & easy or to join a tour. my aunt is worried that we wud not be able to communicate with the locals and get to our destinations (wad with my half cooked jap). omg i wanna go japannnnnnnnnnn!!! its my dream!

ps: the sakura is in abundance in march & april!

hopefully, i really get to go :)
i'll prolly go back to Amore to work (i've called them) to earn myself some pockect money before i find a perm job (eeks!)
it feels so good to be a student and not worry abt earning doru, but hikes hikes, we all have to grow up & take over the responsiblity to earn the dough. it saddens me that im turning 21 soon. not that im afraid of getting old, but... oh well... i tink ive repeated myself many times. its really depressing lar.

ys is booking out tml... hope my sunday will not fly by too quickly.... im looking forward to japan and sakura and sashimi and mount fuji!
ps: i wanna go europe oso ;P

overdue pics again

2006-03-18T00:24:00.000+08:00

it was a HOT HOT day
lester was supposed to join us, but due to some last minute circumstances...

she is enthu abt gg to the theme park, but wanna chicken out at the very 1st ride

erm.. nice teeth.

one ride she wud give an arm for...

it wasnt really a wild ride day, for 5 freaking rides were closed for maintainance. but we were given complimentary tickets to make up for that, so heck. maybe nx time i'll return to conquer the park again. (we wanted to cheat ppl... but im bound by the law. so i cannt speak of my almost-illegal actions)

its nice to be childlike (not childish)... nv lose the child in you!

lester joined us at Settlers after that. we had a good time playing board games :) i loveeeeee!
pictionary, bonkers?/boalzers?/bonnzesrs?/zombie
i love them all, but i always love pictionary the best =)
its a great place to hang out, but its addictive! there are more boardgames for me to discoverrrr!

our dinner at HK cafe

*

wish i had plenty of these

ps: bought my nippon paint! country blossum & raspberry!!
wanted cocoa & cream, but ys said its boring *fumes* and love the combo, but it really reminds me of a coffee house, so i went for other colors :) hope the colors turn out lovely :)))))

killer gastric

2006-03-16T22:56:00.000+08:00

the gastric is a killer.

will be back when im better.

failed.

2006-03-15T22:50:00.000+08:00

i din make it thru the 3rd interview today.

it was good while it lasted. but no one gets what they wish for all the time and i gotta deal with it.
a girl bside me today told me that she has a very supportive grp of frenz who always wished her good luck, and believed in her. i smiled, thinking of my own 'supporters'.
i really appreciate it.

the water confidence test was fun, requiring us to jump frm the plane 4 feet down into the pool -4m deep- & backstroke (with life vest on) back to "shore". i enjoyed it :)
i was no. 62 (amongst the 63 of us, the honour of being 2nd last), and i had to wait econs for my turn to try on the kebaya. grp of 10s went and tried on the uniform and then one by one, they entered this room to allow 2 interviewers to judge them.

my name wasnt called out in the end, meaning i had to go home, thank u and byebye.
my guess is that i failed that the 'hand test part'. i had to allow the 2 (over smiley) women to strutinize my hands, wrists, fingers, face, back, everywhere where skin showed while in the uniform. my fingers are pretty ugly, not the soft, lovely woman fingers. but i love them well - they serve me well and im sry i subjected them to such harsh tests.
i also may have marks deducted for the sractches on my face i inflicted upon myself during the jump frm the plane into the pool; the impact jerked me so hard that i scratched my nose in two places (i was pinching my nose to disallow water to enter during the jump). i din even realized it till i finished bathing and came out and was startled to see myself bleeding in the face.
or maybe i was juz too fat and ugly in the uniform.
perhaps i din walk all prim and proper.
maybe my teeth was too yellow.
who noes?

its disappointing to come a distance but only to be shown the exit. but i will take it in my stride, and take it as a good experience :)
met some nice girls, took away some memories, left my footprints, and i din lose anything. i dun think its a waste of my time coz if i have nv tried, i wud nv nv noe. i have no regrets.
just some disappointment.
just a lil.
a lil more than a lil.

thank you ray, ster and bao who came to lunch with me. they came all the way to my blk to cheer me up and they were concerned abt my interview everytime i had one. they had confidence in me, just like some other frens/family members, but im sry to prove them wrong. maybe im meant for bigger things, u noe.
no, not tigerair.

i think i have had enough of beauty pageants. its fun, i said, but i still think its rather superficial and they did not look at the essence in me; they went as far as skin deep. i understand that in this line, appearance is impt. image is impt. looks are impt. poise is impt. figure is impt, flawless skin is impt.
sorry, i do not possess all of the above.

-touched-
wad i lack in beauty, poise and all things pretty, God more than made up for me in wealth. and i dont mean it in the monetary term.
my aunt just sent me a sms, asking me if i wud like to go for a holiday; shanghai, HK, taipei, darwin or chiangmai, or any other destination. (she wanted to wait till ALL my interviews are over to take me overseas, but now that this has come to an end....)
i noe she just wanna cheer me up :)
and my kaima oso wanna treat me to sushi... my frenz leave thougtful msgs for me... everyone is being nice!

but i dont really need cheering up, tho i appreciate all the kindness.
im fine. its not the end of the world lah.. i will walk on with my chin up high. nth to be ashamed of! me is michelle leh.. not so easily defeated *smirks*

went to the airport with my 3 poly besties, and we juz walked and took the skytrain, went to swensens and sat there for hrs, eating ice cream, chatting, eating dinner, chatting, gossiping.. and then one of the subjects in our gossip talk appeared... then we gossiped somemore.. :)
very fun.
tml, we're gg to the theme park.
its gg be a wild ride.

thank u ppl =)